Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

I was supposed to start in the day hospital this morning but I just went back to bed and buried my head. I did ring them to apologise. I will try again another day.

Yeah thanks. I am glad I rung them. It gives me another chance on Wednesday.

Jeez. That's interesting. I have been worried about it, because I've found my sleep interrupted so much lately. I don't think it's M.E. I've checked the symptoms, and my symptoms wouldn't fall under that. Long Covid though, I'd be worried about, because too many symptoms do fall under that. But then they also fall under mental illness, so juggling too many possible diagnoses unfortunately. I did have blood tests a while back, but unfortunately didn't tell me anything.

I've known of cases where even a head cold has triggered very serious autoimmune 'shocks', but I know those are exceptional cases.

But I have found my stomach is all over the place. Generally speaking, this wouldn't be too off kilter for me, ,normally. Anytime I've gotten a cold, or a flu, I've often gotten a ticky stomach that can be off kilter for days. I've had that since I've been a kid, unfortunately.

And my stomach's been weird since getting ill. But that can be down to the stress of the last few weeks too.

The sad thing is, that's been my experience in certain hospitals. Certain Nurses not working, not talking to patients, and often leaving the work to the nurses who are immigrants to our country. And by golly, they're often the best nurses, those who aren't Irish I mean. Most caring, most obliging, and genuinely most human and empathetic. Irish nurses feel beat down by the system, I don't know. It's not like that in every hospital, and I don't want to generalise.

Other hospitals, the staff across the board are great. It's sad, but then again, we've also heard (either from friends, or family who work in hospitals or from articles) how nurses are facing constant streams of verbal abuse or harassment, as well as physical assaults. They're human, that can take a toll. I have a relative who works in the Office admin of a hospital, and she's got some tales. A few folks they've had to warn security about, because certain vagrants would wander in, late at night, and use the hospital entrance/ reception area as a public toilet, and the mess they leave can not be cleaned up with just a mop, unfortunately.

That said, we're all individuals, and it's horrible to hear how you're being treated, @apache . It might help to journal it, even posting on here might help. Just get the anger out of your system. I know it's honestly shocking and frustrating how poor our mental health services have become in recent times. Even private has become hit and miss.

You might have gotten in on a bad day, I don't know. Or it might be that folks were working overtime, and the regulars were out sick.

It is strange, because I've known folks who've gone into nursing, and who are compassionate. And then I know folks who are like 'it's a job', and who've no compassion whatsoever. I also know many more who would have been great nurses, but I think it just was not for them. A shame.

If you can consult with your GP or anyone familiar with what you're going through right now, they might be better able to advise you. If it's hindering you more than helping, maybe look into an alternative. Might be other hospitals or facilities that would be better able to help.

Yes, in a way. Not the exact same dream but locations(which don't exist in reality) are the 'setting' of bad dreams . Same ones crop up again and again and have done for donkeys.

That sounds horrible, Deja.

Is it connected to a traumatic event? If you are experiencing intense negative emotions frequently in your sleep ot might be worth talking to someone about it. Poor sleep and frequent trauma reactions, even if caused by dreams, can have a really negative impact on physical and mental health.

The dreams connected to trauma is a common occurrence, sadly. The 'script' of the dream might be different, but the theme is always the same.

I have those that coincide with certain dates, or regarding certain traumas. Sometimes they can be re-traumatising. Or literally throw you off the whole day. Sometimes they can lead to other physical ailment. Like physical pains, the feeling of a pulled muscle. Headaches. Stomach issues. Stress.

Sometimes they can be an indicator that one might be withholding something. An indicator it might be time to talk to someone about something.

Good information there Rabble, thanks for the insight! ...I appreciate how you put it - the script varies a bit but the theme is consistent, so true ...and they almost seem more traumatising than the actual (historical) event.

I've taken to the bed. I'm completely overwhelmed with sadness, negativity and darkness and just can't muster up the energy to fake it anymore. Wrang gp surgery this morning the phone was actually answered by a new gp! She was lovely. Kind, compassionate and understood immediately the seriousness of the situation I'm in. Wants me to be seen ASAP so I'm to ring tomorrow at 9.30 to see if she's any cancellation otherwise 9.30 Monday morning. Feeling less scared now.

I hope you find some hope and help, Sardonicat. :)

Got seen by GP today. Very good consultation. Prescribed Prozac, a sleeper to bridge me over the next few weeks and started me on beta- blockers mainly to see if they'll help with the frequency and intensity of my migraine attacks but also to assist with calming me down a little bit. Have to go out everyday for 30min walk (Mr Sardi required to chaperone as no way I can do that alone at the moment) and some counsellor contact details. Won't say I'm feeling better but do feel relieved and less alone.

Oh, that's rough Grem. It's great you are there for your friend and of course it helps when you can fully empathise but it can be very scary it's a lot of responsibility and it can be very triggering too. I hope your friend can turn a corner soon.

Oh, that will be a landmark event. Definitely, things will feel different after. The end of one phase and start of another. Is there anyone that can share the load supporting your friend?

I dunno what to do, I know if I speak to professionals they will ask if I'm suicidal, I'm not. I do think of people being diagnosed with cancer and wish it was me.

I spoke with my sister last night (she took my daugher), spoke with her again this morning and she wants me to go to St. Pats. How long does it take to get in there does anyone know? I've had numerous stints in the mental health section of our local hospital.

No insurance unfortunately

Good luck laoiegem. Keep checking back in here for support when you can.

I'm comfortably numv, ATM. No serious side effects so far from Prozac

Think I'm still drowsy from the sleeper today and that's the overwhelming sympyom at the moment. Not ideal for the ongoing run but sn improvement on the last few weeks. Don't think one beta blocked will have any effect yet will have to see how this goes.

It's very difficult to explain to someone what mental illness is. IF you were walking around with a broken limb, you could at least say 'sorry, I can't do that, I've a broken limb'. With mental illness, it's so damn difficult to explain to someone why you feel like crap. Or why you feel unable to do some things.

As for the look of 'disgust'... its hard to explain to someone why you're feeling one way. And it's probably very difficult for her to comprehend why you're feeling the way you're feeling. It might be less 'disgust' and more 'I can't do anything to help'. That sense of powerlessness is a real thing that we sometimes look past.

A strange analogy, but when someone gets a headcold, it affects everyone within a close vicinity. You have some who are like 'why are you not at your peak, it's just a cold' while others are like 'Ah, take it easy-don't want that head cold to get any worse than it is' and hand you over a hot drink or a lemsip, and then some stay away because they're afraid to catch it. Mental illness is very similar in how folks treat others. But you'll get less sympathy from some than if you'd a cold. And those that 'stay away' do so less because they 'don't want to catch it', and moreso because they feel unable to help.

Also, and I speak from experience, it can be frustrating for other people to see someone struggling mentally. Using the headcold analogy (again) if you don't take time out to treat a headcold, it can turn into something worse. Then people look at you with similar annoyance and a 'why didn't you just rest, you could have spared yourself so much trouble?'. But real life has so many responsibilities, so hence why a cold becomes something worse. A family member of mine, a few years ago, picked up a virus that turned into a bad headcold, that (due to neglect) turned into a flu, that then turned into a chest infection. In all, they were sick for three months (Got sick in January, didn't start to improve until March of that year) and would have been unwell for months later if they hadn't gone to their GP.

Maybe have a chat with your daughter, explain your situation, similar to how you spoke to your boss. And maybe try and explain that it's nothing she did, or nothing anyone does. It's just how the cards fall. (I don't really know your situation, so I'm sure you can phrase this far, far, far better than I can).

Apologies, this turned into a long post.

just off sertraline a week and my sleep has gone awry, is this normal?