Why do some people take such offence if you don't go to their stag party or wedding?

It's just a kind of cultural tide thing and you are swimming against it.

It's never easy swimming against a tide literally or figuratively.

Just do your own thing and try not to let them bother you.

Not going to the Stag party is fine by me.

Not coming to the wedding is a bit different.

I understand some people don't like them, they're expensive, there's hassle with getting done up, possible childcare and hotel costs, maybe days off.

But if a close friend couldn't make it to just the ceremony and leave straight after and it wouldn't be much hassle for them, I'd be a bit disappointed.

I don't mind doing certain things that I don't enjoy, if it makes my friends and family happy. I can handle a bit of hassle on their behalf.

Its called friendship.

Some people couldn't be bothered doing anything that they don't want to do. Its all about them, at all times.

Those are the sort of "friends" you stop talking to.

Yes it does.

Were you not on another thread recently complaining about friends who lost contact with you after they got married and blaming their wives/partners?

We could be seeing the real reason they cut ties with you now!

Life is all about little sacrifices, we don’t always get to just do or participate in the things we like. Just because you don’t like weddings isn’t a good enough reason to stay away from a close friends wedding. It’s obviously an important day for them and they’ve invited you to join in. For the sake of 1 day you’re better off to go whether you like it or not.

It’s a sign of respect for your friend and to be honest it’s a massive show of disrespect of you don’t show up and haven’t a genuine reason for it.

If they stopped talking to me, I would not be meeting up with them etc.

A real friend would actually care about something that matters to their friend. Sounds like your just one of those lads who expects everything to be stagnant and gets angry when their friends evolve.

The wedding industry loves the mentality of some posters here. It is clearly a social faux pas for some if a friend doesn't attend their wedding but nobody can explain why exactly weddings are so special compared to any other event.

It seems to be people's primitive brains that make them attach such importance to ceremonial bullsh*t like weddings. This normie sheeple weakness is manipulated and exploited by the wedding industry, laughing all the way to the bank.

If I invite a friend to do some activity and they say they don't want to/don't feel like it, should I ditch them as a result? Or is it ok once they have an excuse that is deemed be ME to be a "genuine reason"?

And going to a wedding is generally a bigger ordeal and expense than most activities. Inviting others to attend but actually expecting them to do so shows poor social skills and means it was more akin to a summons than an invitation. It shows particularly poor social skills if the friend has previously let it be known that they are not interested in attending weddings, you invite them anyway and then get miffed when they refuse.

It's something I've seen a lot of people fall out over, especially if the wedding is abroad. People that were good friends for years and then suddenly stop talking to each other. I must admit I do hate them myself. Stags can be good craic though.

This is very true. Going or not going to a wedding is not a measure of real friendship.

If someone experiences a marriage breakup, death or depression, it is quite likely that their friends will "go missing" regardless of whether they were at the wedding or not. Particularly true for men IME.

And sometimes it is worse than that, I know several people who were shafted by "friends" who had been at their wedding and vice versa. As they tried to come to terms with what happened, more than once I heard the phrase "But they were at my wedding".

If it was a big wedding with say 200 invitations, it could be more like 10 or 20 not going.

They might start a thread here about it.

I can understand if its close family or friends. If its someone I'm not close with or cousins I haven't seen in years I generally don't bother.

I hate weddings and I hate stag parties. Crap food. Crap speeches. Too much drink. Very false.

I love a good meal with a few friends or catching up for a few pints. If a friend needed a few quid to tide him over I am happy to do so and have. If they rang up on a midweek where I had a load of other stuff on and asked to head out I would.

"They require" - bonkers stuff. And who are you to decide what a very good reason for non attendance is? Does the reason have to be approved by the rest of the herd or just the sheeple resources manager.

The result of all of this is you'll get a typically Irish situation where people are not honest and direct with each other. Instead of someone saying they don't feel like going to the wedding, they will come up with a BS excuse. Everyone will then be able to save face.

Once your reason could be genuine then your fine.