Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Possessions left in our house

Options
2»

Comments

  • Options
    #32
    bucketybuck
    Registered Users Posts: 18,432 ✭✭✭✭bucketybuck


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558592#Comment_121558592

    I have full confidence that this chap will not be paying any solicitor for a letter that everybody knows is meaningless fluff.

    But even if there was a letter, why do you assumes that mean he will then lift his stuff?

    If they are scared of a letter that will never come then their answer becomes even simpler. Dump it and don't tell him. He hasn't looked for it in 20 years, they have to be stupidly meek to think he will suddenly come looking for it now.



  • Options
    #33
    Murph_D
    Registered Users Posts: 10,454 ✭✭✭✭Murph_D


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558513#Comment_121558513

    "grow a pair' 🙄

    It's unreasonable of you to expect this. Women (or anyone else) do not require testicles to be assertive.



  • Options
    #34
    CramCycle
    Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 24,745 Mod ✭✭✭✭CramCycle


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558648#Comment_121558648

    It's an expression, not a demand, as I am sure you are well aware and has nothing to do with literally growing a pair



  • Options
    #35
    Murph_D
    Registered Users Posts: 10,454 ✭✭✭✭Murph_D


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558819#Comment_121558819

    The poster used that phrase at least twice. I know it's not a demand. I'm simply questioning the language here - a request for advice being met with silly gendered phrases that suggest s/he needs to 'man up'.



  • Options
    #36
    magicbastarder
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Arts Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 49,363 CMod ✭✭✭✭magicbastarder


    my suggestion would not be to make any demands that are, prima facie, unreasonable - e.g. i think someone suggested earlier that he be given to the 14th; it's very possible he lives in a different jurisdiction. it's been 10 years, give him a reasonable timeframe in which to respond (like 90 days) and don't give him a way to claim some sort of victimhood.



  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #37
    893bet
    Registered Users Posts: 8,923 ✭✭✭893bet


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558845#Comment_121558845

    Are you offended? Do you think you will be ok?



  • Options
    #38
    CramCycle
    Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 24,745 Mod ✭✭✭✭CramCycle


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558845#Comment_121558845

    Its a common phrase that in this instance clearly means grow up and cop on. Why it is being commented on at all and dragging the conversation off topic is beyond me. Question the language if you must but also contribute to the discussion. Your post did neither. If the language was offensive or annoying, it should have been reported. You took a phrase that is not literal and made it appear like it was an unreasonable request. This silly beggars type of off point posting does nothing for the discussion. I don't think the poster you quoted actually expected it, therefore the idea that you find there request "unreasonable" is peculiar.


    At the OP, you have two clear choices (well 3 but don't chose the third one).

    1. Chuck his stuff in the bin/recycling/charity shop and say nowt about it. If in the future he comes back into the fold, do what my mother does to my dad or my wife to me, shrug your shoulders, and say 'haven't a notion, not seen that stuff in years'.
    2. Give him a reasonable deadline to collect (or if charitble, ask for an address to drop the stuff off), as after this date 45 days from now it is being disposed of.

    The third option is to leave as is, but you know that is not really an option.



  • Options
    #39
    Murph_D
    Registered Users Posts: 10,454 ✭✭✭✭Murph_D


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121559438#Comment_121559438

    Thanks for the boardsplaining there, CramCycle! If my post is so off topic, why give it oxygen? (I disagree with you by the way - I do believe language and word choice is important and I won't be dissuaded from calling it out.) But aplogies all the same to anyone 'offended'.



  • Options
    #40
    Mrs OBumble
    Registered Users Posts: 25,891 ✭✭✭✭Mrs OBumble


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558216#Comment_121558216

    Deadly serious.

    Family feuds have started over less.



  • Options
    #41
    Ezeoul
    Registered Users Posts: 2,574 ✭✭✭Ezeoul


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121559657#Comment_121559657

    I wouldn't be too worried about a family feud.

    He left the stuff there 20 years ago, they've been asking him to remove it for ten years.

    He'd get one more courtesy notice from me of 30 days, then it would be gone.

    Any attempt at legal action from him would be met with a demand for 20 years of the equivalent of a storage unit fee, at the current rates.



  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #42
    Bio Mech
    Registered Users Posts: 1,045 ✭✭✭Bio Mech


    This is less about what you can do and more about what your parents are willing to do. You can advise and dispose as many people have said. If your parents are willing to do that there wont be any legal implications for them. If there is anything small and/or valuable you could throw it in the attic. But mouldy old clothes etc, ditch it.



  • Options
    #43
    Bio Mech
    Registered Users Posts: 1,045 ✭✭✭Bio Mech


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121558320#Comment_121558320

    I would do exactly that myself.



  • Options
    #44
    AndrewJRenko
    Registered Users Posts: 28,939 ✭✭✭✭AndrewJRenko


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121557280#Comment_121557280

    Yes, a picture of the stuff in the skip or in the garden will be very powerful, if yer man has any genuine interest in keeping the stuff.

    Don't ask him 'are you sure you don't want it'. Tell him 'It's going to be dumped on a specific date unless you take it'.



  • Options
    #45
    the_pen_turner
    Registered Users Posts: 7,512 ✭✭✭the_pen_turner


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121565771#Comment_121565771

    thats all i mean . you have evidence you told him and the stuff is being removed if nothing is done to remove it. the ball is firmly in his court



  • Options
    #46
    Dav010
    Registered Users Posts: 14,440 ✭✭✭✭Dav010


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121559645#Comment_121559645

    Life must be difficult if you take everything so literally, and offence so easily.



  • Options
    #47
    Murph_D
    Registered Users Posts: 10,454 ✭✭✭✭Murph_D


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121569174#Comment_121569174

    Not offended at all, fella! Read between the lines and mind how you go! 😉

    OP, hope it works out with your brother. Disposal of large items can be expensive - I find freecycle or similar is a great way of passing on any large items that still have some residual use.

    Good luck!



  • Options
    #48
    Akrasia
    Registered Users Posts: 22,399 ✭✭✭✭Akrasia


    What types of items are in the house?

    Not that it matters legally, I'm just Curious. Are they things like old furniture, or bicycles, sports equipment, musical instruments etc?

    Some of those things can be really valuable, or worse, can be mistaken for something that might be really valuable and that would lead to resentment and accusations down the road

    'my collection of original Les Paul Guitars and hardback first editions of' Harry Potter' got thrown into a skip"



  • Options
    #49
    Seth Brundle
    Moderators, Politics Moderators Posts: 39,521 Mod ✭✭✭✭Seth Brundle


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121569267#Comment_121569267

    If they were important or valuable then they wouldn't have been left there for twenty years!



  • Options
    #50
    Akrasia
    Registered Users Posts: 22,399 ✭✭✭✭Akrasia


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121569285#Comment_121569285

    You'd be surprised. Bulky things get left at mammy's house when the kids are still renting and haven't the space to store them. These days, that rental stage is longer and longer.

    Doesn't mean the owner doesn't care, maybe just feels it's the safest place for them and is taking the parents for granted that they'll mind them.



  • Options
    #51
    Ezeoul
    Registered Users Posts: 2,574 ✭✭✭Ezeoul


    https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121569318#Comment_121569318

    20 years though?

    OP, if you really wanted to be nice, you could text him the details of a storage unit company. Tell him to set up an account and the storage unit company will even arrange people to collect his goods for him and bring them to storage, if he doesn't want to collect them himself.

    He has been given every chance. The ball is now in his court.



  • Advertisement
Advertisement