How common are work faps?

Anyone engaging in this sort of “thing” before lunch is in for a, very, long afternoon.

You’d expect it to be something in the “wheelhouse” of the low level drone but I’ve worked in a place where a very senior figure was caught in a, very, compromising “situation” watching some hardcore pornography.

The guy was too important to face any real disciplinary action so, as “punishment”, he was sent down to sit with the admin pool.

It is incredibly uncomfortable, and terrible etiquette on their part, when you’re sat in the jacks and you hear the little “tic” and muffled thump of a fap in action. What sort of degenerate wouldn’t use the special needs toilets, if they were going to “commit” such an act?

One would wonder if employees were frequently in a state of post fap clarity, would productivity, creativity and innovation improve. After a good fap, you'd have great ideas, know exactly how to proceed and have no qualms about telling some idiot that his sh1t ideas were sh1t.

Providing fap rooms might be a bridge too far but as a compromise staff could be issued with these. No sharing of devices obviously.

..

Im fairly sure my firstborn was conceived on company time.

The joys of working from home.

Often, it's always a slow day at the morgue when there aren't any funerals on.

D fuq is that !????? 🤔 😫

….funny story…..

quite a few years ago, my mate & I decided to go up onto the roof of our office. He had just been trained in something to do with Health & Safety for our office and had been shown how to stop the lifts manually (and wind them up & down also) from the little room on the roof of our 4 storey building. So …. y'know…. boys and big toys …. off we went. Top floor, out the emergency exit to the roof, walked across the top (flat roof) and just opened the door to the wheel-house , and saw a guy sitting on a crate, pants around ankles and a laptop on his lap, having a fap! He prob thought he was in the safest place possible….. no one ever comes up here (no pun). We about faced immediately, left him to it, and returned the following day for a look at the big wheels & cables (very interesting by the way). We have no idea who he was or how he got there . Never saw him before or since.

Groin glue and devil's doorbell, two descriptions of fapping I'd never in my 55 years heard tell of until today, thanks very much

theres a guy that does where i am.

Can see shadow from his toilet cubicle …….. He is very quiet though !

There are obviously plenty of people with cushy jobs if they have time to be shaking hands with the one eyed milkman.

There a place and time for everything! The manky work jacks is the last place that would put me in the mood for it.

You'd wonder if workplace fappers are fapping about work colleagues in work. I'd say that you'd get a good emptying of the seminal vesicles from doing that. Imagine having a flirty conversation with Deirdre the hot receptionist, heading off to the jax and returning to chat to D a few minutes later with your dirty secret and a slight odour of bleach off you.

All sort of filthy perves in offices anyway. Seat sniffers, sanitary bin enthusiasts etc.

Some amount of 'comedians' around Boards these days …… 😴

is there no "Comedy Club" thread ??

If someone has reached the desperation stage of fapping in an average work toilet in the presence of other men's stink and skidmarks, they're likely horny as hell with seminal vesicles engorged to the max. Result would be a bigger, gloopier load. Not South Park levels of mess but there may be an animalistic, territory marking instinct for a workplace fapper to spooge everywhere and not clean it up. Animals.

I used to at school as I had a teacher fetish but never at any job as all jobs I've had were sausage fests so never felt the temptation to.

I worked in a place where they called a lad ‘Joey the Grips’, a play on the character from Roddy Doyle’s ‘The Commitments’. His name was, actually, Joseph and they told him the nickname was because he always had “such a good grip of things”.

The real reason was because, at least, once a day Joey would return from the toilets red-faced with just his right sleeve rolled up and he’d be slightly out of breath. He was definitely less cranky to deal with after his return.