In love with coworker. Accused of Harassment.

you need to go and get professional help

You're not in love with a co-worker. You're in love with a fantasy you have dreamed up. You don't know her. Everything you think you love about her is in your imagination.

The most optimistic view is that all that drama about how you feel in your 'core' is your way of trying to put a romantic spin on a raging lust. However, if you genuinely think you want to be worthy of a smile from this total stranger then you are in more dangerous territory.

You have been advised to talk to a professional and I don't think that was a flippant remark. You are not in touch with reality and it is having a negative effect on this person.

I am full of respect for this young woman (I'm assuming it's a woman) who has decided that she won't tolerate your advances. She made it clear that she's not interested, now she's making it clear that she's not going to politely suffer through the weirdness, as so many women have had to do in their workplace. Gives me hope for the future!

Clean up your LinkedIn to begin with mate. It may be a possible option to delete your LinkedIn altogether.

You're unhealthily infatuated with a total stranger from a distance. You're not in a relationship with them and are not 'in love' with them. Tread very carefully here - you're at serious risk of being fired on the spot.

How can you say:

'My coworker owes me nothing'

And then say:

'I fully respect they said no. Why can't that respect be shown by me improving myself or reassuring them about the issues that made that no?'

Because, in your own words, your coworker owes you nothing.

Seek help.

You fully respect they've said no and still write to them, buy them gifts and so on.

No Means no.

Respect that and speak to a professional. Then with help you can move on with your life.

I think the core of your issue is your "Fear of ending up alone". That's what's driving this behavior, you're doing desperate things when common sense and reason should've stopped you dead in your tracks before you messaged that girl on social media(I'm assuming you're a guy and this is a girl you're interested in). So the question is why are you afraid of ending up alone? Unpack it and look at it in the cold light of day. The point is you can't allow those fears to drive your behavior. Start doing things by yourself, get comfortable in your own company, go travelling by yourself. I mean so what if you do end up unattached, single? Do you really think a married person has it better than a single person? They don't. There are so many miserable and lonely married people. This idea that you have in your mind that if you could get married or be in a relationship then you'd be ok, happy.......this is a myth. You need to make a rich and satisfying life for yourself independent of another person, otherwise the desperate behavior you engaged in with your coworker will happen again, with another person. Another human being will not fulfill you or make you happy, this Is the truth, so start thinking about what would constitute a rich and satisfying life, independent of a relationship with another person? Figure that our for yourself and you'll resolve the fear that drives the dysfunctional behavior.

Funny how people so often think that somebody doesn't fancy them because they don't understand them.

It's a very particular type of problem, a very common pattern.

"Why doesn't this silly woman understand what a great guy I am? If I could just MAKE her listen to me…"

Trying to get romantically involved with a co worker seldom works out well. Walk away.

It’s clear you’re struggling with deep emotions, but the most important thing now is to focus on healing and moving forward. Love should be mutual and respectful—when someone says no, the kindest thing you can do for both of you is to let go. Seeking therapy or support from close friends can help you process these feelings in a healthy way. You deserve happiness, but it won’t come from chasing someone who isn’t interested. Redirect your energy into self-growth, new experiences, and meaningful connections that are built on mutual interest and respect.

There are no steps there on your part.

You do not know this person.

You do not know this person.

You have built up am infatuation with this person.

OP. It's quite rare that viewpoints and responses are unanimous on the PI forum. But today everybody here is searching for a way to say the same thing: You're being creepy, you need to leave her alone, you need professional help.

This is one of the most worrying things I've read here in a long time:

"I understand these sentiments, but they seem to me to contradict each other. If, as HazeDoll says, I do not actually love my coworker, that it is just a fantasy I have dreamed up because I don't know them, then does that not also apply to their no? Their no is based on an idea of me not based on knowing me either. I know that knowing me may not change the no, it could make it even more definitive. But at least it would be based on knowing me."

You're saying that her rejection of you isn't valid unless it's on your terms. It's very clear from this that you don't consider her a real person with independent thoughts and opinions.

She has seen enough, she's not interested and I'm afraid it's very clear to everybody here why she's so determined to have nothing to do with you. I hope she's getting support with this.