Marriage Proposal. but she wants to pick eng ring

LegacyUser · 08-01-2007 08:41PM #1

hello

i have been living with my girlfriend for over 5 years now and we are very happy together, anyway its getting to that stage now were we really want to get married, its what we both want and are looking onto buying our first house this year too...

aaannnyyway!! she whats us to pick her enganement ring together, which i think is really cool, cos it means it will be a ring she really really likes, instead of me making a stupid choice and picking something she only kinda likes... i know what she likes but would prefere us to pick it together,,,

now thats not the problem... the problem is, How do i make a romantic proposal when we are going to get the ring together? do i ask her and then we go looking for a ruing? or do we just go shopping for it and that it.. or go shoppoing but just pick out what she wants and buy it some other time and propose out of the blue?

i really want it to be special for her, but it kinda gives it away if i say too her .."right come on into town till we get this ring sorted out.." lol

any advise would be greatly appreciated

free2fly · 08-01-2007 09:05PM

I'd say go looking at rings together so that you know what she likes, but don't buy it when she's with you. Just say something like "Yes, that's a lovely ring." Then buy it later and surprise her with a nice, romantic proposal

py2006 · 08-01-2007 09:07PM

I am tempted to say "Don't do it!" and "Get out while you can!" but that would get me a slap on the wrist from the mods!.........DOH!! :rolleyes:

But seriously, she already knows you will be picking the ring together so she knows the whole romantic surpise proposal wont be there.

I am not sure how your really gonna go about doing this. Unless you get her to pick the ring and some how give the impression that it will be a few months before you can pick it up or pay for it! Then take her out to dinner or whatever the following weekend and surprise her!

There ya go!

Paladin · 08-01-2007 09:09PM

Dont do it! Get out while you can!

A buddy of mine had his fiance with him getting the ring anyway. I think he proposed without the ring.

_blank_ · 08-01-2007 09:10PM

Tell her you'll go ring shopping at some indeterminate date in the furure, then go and get a really gaudy faux-diamond monstrosity somewhere and take her out on a really romantic date, before the ring shopping date, and propose there.

Make sure she isn't expecting it. Then ye can go and get the proper ring.

Hope she says yes.

daiixi · 08-01-2007 09:13PM

Sure the romantic proposal can be there. You can do whatever you want, she just doesn't want you to have the ring when you propose! Why don't you organise whatever you want to do and when proposing offer her an empty box with an IOU in it? That'd make me laugh. Then you can go shopping for the ring together. Or another option is to get a jelly ring or some cheap plastic ring or the like. Use your imagination, you don't need the engagement ring in order to propose...

iMax · 08-01-2007 09:15PM

When I proposed we went looking together, she spotted the one she wanted & then I sent her off while I paid the deposit, but bought it outright. Propose when she's least expecting it, not at a meal or anything, that way it'll be a surprise.

axer · 08-01-2007 09:15PM

You could always propose to her with like an onion ring or something, just like homer simpson!

No seriously, propose to her with something small and insignificant because the act will be significant enough. Then go out and buy the ring the next day or whatever. Is there such a place as her favourite place or type of place?

LegacyUser · 08-01-2007 09:16PM

'

py2006 wrote:

Unless you get her to pick the ring and some how give the impression that it will be a few months before you can pick it up or pay for it! Then take her out to dinner or whatever the following weekend and surprise her!

There ya go!

yea... that might be a good idea..... sounds like a good idea..
speakin of paying for it.. whats the average people pay for engagement rings?
money is not a problem, but i never really spoke to my mates about prices they payed or anything, and i cant really ask now cos they all start getting susspicious lol'

free2fly · 08-01-2007 09:28PM

seansouth wrote:

Tell her you'll go ring shopping at some indeterminate date in the furure, then go and get a really gaudy faux-diamond monstrosity somewhere and take her out on a really romantic date, before the ring shopping date, and propose there.

Make sure she isn't expecting it. Then ye can go and get the proper ring.

Hope she says yes.

ROFL! Someone did that to me once. Bought this gawdy green and gold ring that looked real until I took it out of the box!! And proposed to me with it. It was really funny. The look on my face must have been comic! He knew I hated green and gold gawdy rings

I'll never forget that!

loodles · 08-01-2007 10:41PM

My friend OH proposed without a ring over a nice romantic dinner. He had booked a hotel in town the next night and they went, picked the ring and had dinner and a night in the hotel.
She was thrilled and couldnt have asked for a nicer proposal, not having the ring at the time was insignificant as it the celebrations were drawn out over the weekend and made her feel more special. Good luck

seamus · 08-01-2007 11:26PM

My brother got engaged just before Christmas. If you want to go mad on it, this is how he did it;

1. Book flights to New York, and an expensive hotel overlooking 5th avenue.
2. Tell her that you're going to a ball (work or whatever) on the day you're flying out.
3. Let her best mate in on it, and arrange for her best mate to take her out and get nails and hair etc done "for the ball" the day before the flight out. No girl wants to look like crap on her engagement day.
4. That morning, have your Dad ring you to wake you up. Claim it's a wrong number/drunk brother/etc.
5. Tell her to get her **** together, she's going to New York.
6. Take a second to laugh (inwardly) at the utterly perplexed face on your partner.
7. Propose.
8. Take a second to appreciate the happiness you've just caused.
9. Pack bags, go to airport, fly to New York and buy ridiculously huge rock for fraction of what you'd pay here.

LegacyUser · 08-01-2007 11:27PM

'What you should do is buy a cheap crappy ring from some crap shop, and propose with tat, then say dont worry, we'll go pick a ring tomorrow..'

comer_97 · 08-01-2007 11:28PM

go to popular ring shop, buy a ring. this ring should match some of the hints and suggestions she has said previously. think carefully. those hints have been made.

Propose.... then go to same ring venue together to get the perfect ring exchanging the one you have previously bought.

simple.

it worked for me less than 2 weeks ago!

6th · 08-01-2007 11:30PM

Buy something really cheap, a toy ring or something, and pop the question before you go shopping with her. Make it romantic and that little piece of plastic will mean more to her than anything she picks out ... also she wont be expecting it!

Anti · 08-01-2007 11:44PM

6th wrote:

Buy something really cheap, a toy ring or something, and pop the question before you go shopping with her. Make it romantic and that little piece of plastic will mean more to her than anything she picks out ... also she wont be expecting it!

Nice advice. This is deffinatly worth a go.

LegacyUser · 09-01-2007 12:59AM

'whatever you do, make sure you choose a diamond that was ethicly mined and traded fairly. you don't want a history of death and enslavement attached to your engagement.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conflict_diamond

http://www.dejoria.co.uk/conflict-free-diamonds.html
http://www.diamonds.ca/'

LegacyUser · 09-01-2007 01:40AM

seamus wrote:

My brother got engaged just before Christmas. If you want to go mad on it, this is how he did it;

1. Book flights to New York, and an expensive hotel overlooking 5th avenue.
2. Tell her that you're going to a ball (work or whatever) on the day you're flying out.
3. Let her best mate in on it, and arrange for her best mate to take her out and get nails and hair etc done "for the ball" the day before the flight out. No girl wants to look like crap on her engagement day.
4. That morning, have your Dad ring you to wake you up. Claim it's a wrong number/drunk brother/etc.
5. Tell her to get her **** together, she's going to New York.
6. Take a second to laugh (inwardly) at the utterly perplexed face on your partner.
7. Propose.
8. Take a second to appreciate the happiness you've just caused.
9. Pack bags, go to airport, fly to New York and buy ridiculously huge rock for fraction of what you'd pay here.

I'd do that! But I do love New York.

Black Swan · 09-01-2007 02:51AM

gettin hitched wrote:

now thats not the problem... the problem is, How do i make a romantic proposal when we are going to get the ring together?

Surprise her! Propose over a grand dinner and candlelight, then go out a pick the ring together. It"s really not the ring that counts, cause it only symbolizes your love.

hunnymonster · 09-01-2007 07:03AM

There is a weddings forum somewhere on boards with lots of ideas there. One that I quite liked is a few guys who have bought a cheap dress ring to propose with and then the couple have gone together to pick the rock.

dade · 09-01-2007 07:53AM

hunnymonster wrote:

There is a weddings forum somewhere on boards with lots of ideas there. One that I quite liked is a few guys who have bought a cheap dress ring to propose with and then the couple have gone together to pick the rock.

that's what i did. we where in Disney in LA, we had spoken about it before and thought it was right for us. SO i vanished for 5 minutes while in a disney store and bought a Micky Mouse ring, literally

. anyway in the middle of that board walk i got down on one knee. and had a lot of photos taken and video by the jap tourists, probobly on wangs amazing home videos at this stage, I was morto over that bit. then when we got back to dublin spent the next 2 weeks looking for teh ring she wanted.

The Corinthian · 09-01-2007 09:29AM

Buy a cheap ring, with the understanding that you can either part exchange it or even get another one. Propose with that and then let her loose on the jewelers.

miles teg · 09-01-2007 09:49AM

If she insists on picking the ring, you should get to be involved in picking the wedding dress. Tis only fair.
I await a torrent of female protests.

matrim · 09-01-2007 09:57AM

I skipped a few of the replys so don't know if this has been suggested, but a friend of mine took his girlfriend on holiday, proposed there and then told her he had booked tickets to Antwerp (big place for diamonds apparently) so that they could get the ring.

Another option would be to propose with something other than a ring, when you first propose use a necklace that you know matches something she already has, and they get the ring together.

NextSteps · 09-01-2007 10:20AM

seamus wrote:

My brother got engaged just before Christmas. If you want to go mad on it, this is how he did it;

1. Book flights to New York, and an expensive hotel overlooking 5th avenue.
2. Tell her that you're going to a ball (work or whatever) on the day you're flying out.
3. Let her best mate in on it, and arrange for her best mate to take her out and get nails and hair etc done "for the ball" the day before the flight out. No girl wants to look like crap on her engagement day.
4. That morning, have your Dad ring you to wake you up. Claim it's a wrong number/drunk brother/etc.
5. Tell her to get her **** together, she's going to New York.
6. Take a second to laugh (inwardly) at the utterly perplexed face on your partner.
7. Propose.
8. Take a second to appreciate the happiness you've just caused.
9. Pack bags, go to airport, fly to New York and buy ridiculously huge rock for fraction of what you'd pay here.

Wow! Do that!

JungleBunny · 09-01-2007 10:23AM

I picked out my ring the other week

in Fields.
He wanted me to be there to pick it out as I'll be wearing it for a very long time and he wanted to make sure I liked it.

I know he has the ring, but I have no idea when, where or how he will propose. The anticipation of it all is killing me, but when it does happen it will be magic.
Some people might think it takes away from the surprise of it, but I don't think so. No matter how he proposes, it will be magic.

I also liked the fact that I was there as I know he would have spent a fortune on the engagement ring. This way I got to pick out exactly what I wanted and it wasn't expensive at all... no need to spend a fortune on an engagement (ring or proposal). Something simple in my eyes goes a lot further than something so fancy.

I'd prefer to save up that money and put it towards the deposit we are trying to save for a house.

Don't think too extravagant OP. Simplicity is the key.

Miss Fluff · 09-01-2007 10:58AM

seansouth wrote:

Tell her you'll go ring shopping at some indeterminate date in the furure, then go and get a really gaudy faux-diamond monstrosity somewhere and take her out on a really romantic date, before the ring shopping date, and propose there.

Make sure she isn't expecting it. Then ye can go and get the proper ring.

Hope she says yes.

Exectly what I was going to suggest. Or a can ring-pull. Anything gaudy and cute will suffice until you go and get the actual ring together. Good luck, hope she says yes

event · 09-01-2007 11:17AM

my cousin was proposed to a montha or two ago

the BF got a dummy ring in the jewellers, was a normal ring with glass instead of diamonds, looked like a normal ring from a distance

the next weekend they went to the jewellers to pick it out, id say you could do that

tinkerbell · 09-01-2007 02:27PM

seamus wrote:

My brother got engaged just before Christmas. If you want to go mad on it, this is how he did it;

1. Book flights to New York, and an expensive hotel overlooking 5th avenue.
2. Tell her that you're going to a ball (work or whatever) on the day you're flying out.
3. Let her best mate in on it, and arrange for her best mate to take her out and get nails and hair etc done "for the ball" the day before the flight out. No girl wants to look like crap on her engagement day.
4. That morning, have your Dad ring you to wake you up. Claim it's a wrong number/drunk brother/etc.
5. Tell her to get her **** together, she's going to New York.
6. Take a second to laugh (inwardly) at the utterly perplexed face on your partner.
7. Propose.
8. Take a second to appreciate the happiness you've just caused.
9. Pack bags, go to airport, fly to New York and buy ridiculously huge rock for fraction of what you'd pay here.

Ahhh!! That's so rosemantic! One of the best ideas on this thread!!

Probably would have cost your brother a small fortune, but considering you are saving anyway on the price of the ring ... how much of a fraction of the price you'd pay here are we talking??

seamus · 09-01-2007 03:34PM

Around 20% I'd say. Obviously depends on the type of band and the carat of the Diamond.

sofireland · 09-01-2007 03:36PM

JungleBunny wrote:

I picked out my ring the other week in Fields.
He wanted me to be there to pick it out as I'll be wearing it for a very long time and he wanted to make sure I liked it.

I know he has the ring, but I have no idea when, where or how he will propose. The anticipation of it all is killing me, but when it does happen it will be magic.
Some people might think it takes away from the surprise of it, but I don't think so. No matter how he proposes, it will be magic.

I also liked the fact that I was there as I know he would have spent a fortune on the engagement ring. This way I got to pick out exactly what I wanted and it wasn't expensive at all... no need to spend a fortune on an engagement (ring or proposal). Something simple in my eyes goes a lot further than something so fancy.

I'd prefer to save up that money and put it towards the deposit we are trying to save for a house.

Don't think too extravagant OP. Simplicity is the key.

Well i did exactly the same thing, my fiancee and i went shopping one day and we were in fields and i said for a laugh look at some rings, i took mental notes of what she liked, and there was one ring in particular. I put the deposit then on the ring, my OH knew, but little did she know she'd have to wait til we were in Spain (6 months later) to get the ring.

Just proposed to her at a nice intimate romantic meal, followed by flambé strawberrys with Champagne!

sweet-rasmus · 09-01-2007 05:33PM

free2fly wrote:

I'd say go looking at rings together so that you know what she likes, but don't buy it when she's with you. Just say something like "Yes, that's a lovely ring." Then buy it later and surprise her with a nice, romantic proposal

brill idea this! go for it!!!

LegacyUser · 09-01-2007 05:49PM

'Step 1 : go down on bended knee and ask girl to marry U

If she says 'Yes' :

Step 2 : go to the Jewellers shop together and get ring
Step 3 : get married
Step 4 : constant rumpy pumpy
Step 5 : girl pushes out kid
Step 6 : Look after kid for 25 years
Step 7 : GoTo Step 4

If she say 'No' :

Then, U're f*cked.'

hunnymonster · 09-01-2007 05:59PM

The Boardsie men are quite a romantic bunch aren't they? It's always lovely to hear stories of love & thoughfulness like these.

09-01-2007 09:36PM

I got engaged a few months ago. My boyfriend asked me outright when we were on holiday and then we went ring shopping when we got back. I really liked it that way because it avoided two scenarios-

1) Him buying a ring I didn't like
2) Deciding to buy it abroad (after being proposed to on holiday) and being under pressure to pick something out.

It took me a few goes and a few shops to find my ring but I absolutely adore it.

I'm not a very girly-girl anyway so the whole down-on-one-knee-with-a-ring-box idea didn't appeal to me at all.

Victor · 10-01-2007 01:59AM

seamus wrote:

My brother got engaged just before Christmas. If you want to go mad on it, this is how he did it;

1. Book flights to New York, and an expensive hotel overlooking 5th avenue.
2. Tell her that you're going to a ball (work or whatever) on the day you're flying out.
3. Let her best mate in on it, and arrange for her best mate to take her out and get nails and hair etc done "for the ball" the day before the flight out. No girl wants to look like crap on her engagement day.
4. That morning, have your Dad ring you to wake you up. Claim it's a wrong number/drunk brother/etc.
5. Tell her to get her **** together, she's going to New York.
6. Take a second to laugh (inwardly) at the utterly perplexed face on your partner.
7. Propose.
8. Take a second to appreciate the happiness you've just caused.
9. Pack bags, go to airport, fly to New York and buy ridiculously huge rock for fraction of what you'd pay here.

Make sure her passport, etc. is in order.

Stargal · 10-01-2007 02:06AM

sofireland wrote:

I put the deposit then on the ring, my OH knew, but little did she know she'd have to wait til we were in Spain (6 months later) to get the ring.

You waited 6 months?! That's so cruel...

Marriage Proposal. but she wants to pick eng ring

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