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Making friends online?

  • 08-05-2011 9:37am
    #1
    TheSockMonster
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭


    Hi all,

    So basically, im a little (a lot) short on friends right now. Its a long story but I fell out of contact with all my old school friends and they have all moved away now. I live in a very rural area and I dont know very many people. Also, Im painfully shy at first. Anyway, I find it impossible to make friends the usual way so Im trying to get to know people over the internet who I can hopefully make friends with. Im new to the gay scene and I dont really know where to start. I just want to be clear-Im not looking for hookups. Does anyone have any advice or good websites? Or is it a bad idea. Im nearly 20 btw. Thanks :)


Comments

  • #2
    Rick_
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,620 ✭✭✭Rick_


    Websites with a good selection of gay Irish guys:

    www.gaydar.ie (large proportion looking for hook-ups but some decent guys on there)
    www.okcupid.com (large proportion from Dublin but plenty from elsewhere and it's a relationship orientated site)
    www.ladslads.com (good proportion of guys from all over Ireland on here)
    www.plentyoffish.com (biggest free dating site in the world, always worth a try)

    Hope they help in some form. Oh, and of course, don't forget all us guys on here, talk to us and be friends with us too!


  • #3
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,220 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    Paddy C wrote: »
    Websites with a good selection of gay Irish guys:

    www.gaydar.ie (large proportion looking for hook-ups but some decent guys on there)
    www.okcupid.com (large proportion from Dublin but plenty from elsewhere and it's a relationship orientated site)
    www.ladslads.com (good proportion of guys from all over Ireland on here)
    www.plentyoffish.com (biggest free dating site in the world, always worth a try)

    Hope they help in some form. Oh, and of course, don't forget all us guys on here, talk to us and be friends with us too!

    Some of the sites mentioned by paddyc are fine but if you want something with more of a social dimension than people looking for hook ups then the forum here isn't bad (could be better) as well as queerid.com and gaire.com and angrypotato.net -

    It's not a bad idea to try this as one way of making friends but I would really caution against it being the only way - face to face contact is a far superior way of making friends in my opinion. - you could for example come along to our meeting on May 21st - I know thats probably a really scary thought for you but it is something you should consider (I used to be an extremely shy person too and still am to an extent)

    Do you have any interests? sport, reading, writing, music, volunteering?

    Could you join any local community groups at all?

    When you say rural - are you near a town or city at all?

    EDIT: - Just noticed you are from wexford - there is a new gay youth group there

    http://www.gaywexford.com/sphere.htm

    Oh and feel free to stay around here - we are very welcoming

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #4
    TylerIE
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,635 ✭✭✭TylerIE


    TheSockMonster wrote: »
    Hi all,

    So basically, im a little (a lot) short on friends right now. Its a long story but I fell out of contact with all my old school friends and they have all moved away now. I live in a very rural area and I dont know very many people. Also, Im painfully shy at first. Anyway, I find it impossible to make friends the usual way so Im trying to get to know people over the internet who I can hopefully make friends with. Im new to the gay scene and I dont really know where to start. I just want to be clear-Im not looking for hookups. Does anyone have any advice or good websites? Or is it a bad idea. Im nearly 20 btw. Thanks :)

    As regards good websites those mentioned by Johnnymcg (esp queerid) or indeed these forums may be your best bet. I have met some people who I spoke to on these boards, and indeed knew one in a previous existance, and if your not after hook-ups it may be a good way to get to know people.

    Over time other people will likely post from your region and some will be in a similar position.

    To be honest some of the other websites are not ideal - the majority of people on a lot of them are just after hook-ups.

    Im from a rural area and its easy to feel that your the "only gay in the village" but Iv learned in the last year that theres plenty.


  • #5
    Daith
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,230 ✭✭✭Daith


    Johnnymcg wrote: »
    Some of the sites mentioned by paddyc are fine but if you want something with more of a social dimension than people looking for hook ups then the forum here isn't bad (could be better) as well as queerid.com and gaire.com and angrypotato.net -

    Agreed with this. I met a tonne of great friends from queerid.com. It did take a while though and largely the people I became friends with were new to the site but I think it's a good direction to go in.


  • #6
    Meesared
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,237 ✭✭✭Meesared


    Ive made friends with another person like me (trans) and i would now consider her my best friend :) Most contacts ive made are through IRC


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  • #7
    TheSockMonster
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭TheSockMonster


    Heya, thanks for all the replies. I joined some of those websites. Glad to hear there is a youth group starting in wexford. I was on that site yesterday and never noticed it. :) Where is the meeting for this forum happening?


  • #8
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,220 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    TheSockMonster wrote: »
    Heya, thanks for all the replies. I joined some of those websites. Glad to hear there is a youth group starting in wexford. I was on that site yesterday and never noticed it. :) Where is the meeting for this forum happening?

    In Dublin - You could come up and stay in a hostel maybe?

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056242803

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #9
    TheSockMonster
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭TheSockMonster


    I dont think I'd be able to make it. Hopefully I'll make it to one in the future. I joined a couple of those sites and I've made contact with some people so hopefully something will come of it.


  • #10
    KnifeWRENCH
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,148 ✭✭✭✭KnifeWRENCH


    The only one of those sites I've ever been on is gaydar (deleted my account after a while) but there are some genuinely nice guys on it just looking for friends. They may be hard to find among the dozens just looking for hookups but they do exist, so it's worth trying anyway. :)


  • #11
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,220 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    OP - I'm guessing from the lesbians thread that you are female. In that case gaydar.ie is a really bad idea! but try gaydargirls

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



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  • #12
    littlehedgehog
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 588 ✭✭✭littlehedgehog


    www.angrypotato.net is a really friendly LGBT forum also, which has meet ups every couple of months in Dublin :)

    I hope you find people to chat with! It is very difficult feeling so isolated in a rural area - I did find the internet a great way to chat to people, and get to know them a bit so I felt at ease at the different meet ups and nights out. It really does make the whole thing a bit less scary.


  • #13
    Barna77
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,272 ✭✭✭Barna77


    KnifeWRENCH wrote: »
    The only one of those sites I've ever been on is gaydar (deleted my account after a while) but there are some genuinely nice guys on it just looking for friends. They may be hard to find among the dozens just looking for hookups but they do exist, so it's worth trying anyway. :)
    Been there, done that, deleted the account. I'm still in touch with a couple of guys, but eventually got sick of it and delted my profile.

    I managed to get my own stalker :mad:


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