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Married woman wants me I think

  • 11-04-2012 11:20PM
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    so, I've been working with a girl for 5 years and we've always got on really well and it's obvious there is serious chemistry going on. She's sexy as **** and great craic but the problem is she is married.

    I'm not interested in a relationship with her but I wouldn't mind something casual and I reckon she's thinking the same. A few of us from work are going away for a weekend and anyone who has parteners is bringing theirs but she made a point of telling me quietly her husband wasn't coming and gave me a suggestive look.

    Is it bad if I sleep with a married woman or is that between her and her husband to sort out?


Comments

  • #2
    girl2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 654 ✭✭✭girl2


    Do yourself a favour and stay well away from it. These sorts of things only ever end up in tears. It's a different ball game when someone is married, don't cross that line. Plus, if people found out (and they will find out because the truth always comes out in the end), what would people think of you? Plus you would be the defining reason that her marriage ends.

    Tread carefully op. Hope you do ok.


  • #3
    P. Breathnach
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,089 ✭✭✭✭P. Breathnach


    office chick wrote: »
    ... the problem is she is married....
    Not a problem.

    Don't touch.


  • #4
    Emme
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,055 ✭✭✭Emme


    She's married - don't go there.


  • #5
    Da Shins Kelly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,048 ✭✭✭Da Shins Kelly


    No, just no.


  • #6
    Mickey Dazzler
    Closed Accounts Posts: 586 ✭✭✭Mickey Dazzler


    I am going to go against the grain here and say go for it. You're not the one who is married.

    She is the one taking chances not you. This sort of things happens all the time.


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  • #7
    Payton
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,693 ✭✭✭Payton


    Mickey Dazzler wrote: »
    I am going to go against the grain here and say go for it. You're not the one who is married.

    She is the one taking chances not you. This sort of things happens all the time.
    There are boundaries in life that you dont cross....this is one of them. If she is looking for a fling, let her look elsewhere. Walk away and keep your dignity.


  • #8
    Emme
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,055 ✭✭✭Emme


    Mickey Dazzler wrote: »
    I am going to go against the grain here and say go for it. You're not the one who is married.

    She is the one taking chances not you. This sort of things happens all the time.

    Would you like it if she was your wife, Mickey?


  • #9
    robbie_998
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,222 ✭✭✭robbie_998


    Look at the other side of the coin


    You have to work with this person on a regular basis

    Relationship etc + work = bad


  • #10
    P. Breathnach
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,089 ✭✭✭✭P. Breathnach


    Emme wrote: »
    Would you like it if she was your wife, Mickey?
    This is (largely) an anonymous board: maybe it is.


  • #11
    Dubhlinner
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 456 ✭✭Dubhlinner


    The fact you started a thread on this is probably a good indication that going through with it will make you feel terrible.

    The type of borderline sociopath who could go through with it without any regrets probably would have already boned her by now. A sneaky ride won't be worth feeling like crap later on.

    Don't do it man. I've even got some selfish reasons should you not give a toss about her husband:

    1. She may tell someone. What starts as gossip to 1 female friend could spread like wildfire. Best case scenario everyone thinks you're a dick. Though definite possibility husband and his mates beat you to a pulp.

    2. She could get pregnant.

    3. She may be cheating on husband already. Could have crotch rot consequences for you. All very well saying you'll use a condom but if a girl doesn't wanna use one she usually doesn't have to.

    4. She'll have it hanging over you. This could have work related consequences. Seems like she has more to lose but you never know how people can twist things.


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  • #12
    Stavro Mueller
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,673 ✭✭✭Stavro Mueller


    If you do this, you'll be spitting on your own doorstep. You want to sleep with a married woman. Who you work with. On a trip away with the people you work alongside :eek: Riiiiight.

    I'm not sure which part of your cunning plan is the most bone-headed to be honest. Do you really believe that nobody will notice or find out? That if people find out, that they'll keep shtum? You run a real risk of damaging your personal and professional reputation here. You could find yourself having to get a new job if things go wrong with this woman.

    The things Dubhlinner mentioned aren't too far off the mark either. And all for a casual fling with someone who you said yourself you're only interested in for a bit of fun. You posted here asking the question so deep down you know its wrong. Think with your brain on this one, not other parts of your anatomy. You'll be glad you did.


  • #13
    Ickle Magoo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,485 ✭✭✭✭Ickle Magoo


    firedancer, personal abuse is not permitted on this forum...if you have no mature, civil and constructive advice to offer the OP - from their perspective of the issue they posted about - kindly refrain from posting.

    If you haven’t done so already, please take the time to read the [URL=" http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056181484"]forum rules[/URL] in the charter.

    Many thanks.



    As per site policy, if you have an issue with any moderator instruction or request please contact a relevant moderator via PM - DO NOT drag the thread further off-topic by responding on-thread


  • #14
    tinyprincess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4 ✭tinyprincess


    OP if it's only a casual thing stay well away, there are plenty of single girls out there. Are you sure she wants to take this further, if ye get on so surely her situation with husband would have come up in ye're conversations.


  • #15
    squonk
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,407 Mod ✭✭✭✭squonk


    There is a lot of opinion on here saying don't do it. Personally speaking I wouldn't myself but you should do what feels right to you. If she is looking for something with you then she either isn't the greatest wife in the world or, more likely, herself and the husband have issues that neither of them appear to be addressing. Either way, it's not your problem. They are responsible for their own marriage.

    People get overly sentimental about stuff like this. If something happens on the weekend then it's the business only of the two people involved. While I might not personally approve if one of my work colleagues was having an affair with another married colleague, at the end of the day it's none of my business. In the end I can only say do what you want to do, as is your right. Make sure you are comfortable with your choice and that you are doing it for reasons you fully support at the time.


  • #16
    firedancer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 125 ✭✭firedancer


    sorry if my last post was too strongly worded but this whole situation is abusive . Abuse of her husband, of marriage, and abuse of herself, if she is so unhappy then have the dignity and respect to end her marriage, if there are genuine feelings present for you OP then she should have the courage to end what is obviously not working for her , although perhaps 'a bit on the side' is all she is looking for.
    Either way, it leaves a bad taste in the mouth, and OP I suspect all you are seeking on here is the green light from someone to take the responsibility of making a moral decision off your own shoulders. Bit sad.


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