Sleepwalking to the toilet while Drunk

DulchieLaois · 18-03-2015 02:08PM #1

Hi,

I have a tendancy to sleepwalk when drunk, especially if i want to go to the toilet.

My poor wife keeps waking up and having to guide me to the toilets which is not funny anymore as I can literally go anywhere in the house

any advice please besides drinking less

Thanks

kneemos · 18-03-2015 02:09PM

Don't drink at all.

Mesrine65 · 18-03-2015 02:09PM

http://bedwettingstore.com/bedwettingalarms.html?utm_expid=222473-8.0S8Az64LQFGl8aoQG8pSdQ.1&utm_referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.ie%2F

Menas · 18-03-2015 02:10PM

Don't drink for an hour before going to bed. Have a lash before you go to bed?

You are welcome!

Renegade Mechanic · 18-03-2015 02:10PM

An air horn to wake you up from a distance?

The Backwards Man · 18-03-2015 02:11PM

If you're drinking is inconveniencing someone else it's a no brainer, like it or not.

Drink less

libelula · 18-03-2015 02:12PM

In fairness, if drink is making you act the maggot to the point that your wife has to guide you around like a three year old...it's probably time to stop getting pissed tbh.

Generic Dreadhead · 18-03-2015 02:13PM

There has never been a more fitting thread to say one of those recently banned comments about urine :P

Kevin McCloud · 18-03-2015 02:13PM

Wear a nappy, alot of adults wear them. Its a fetish sort of thing.

kneemos · 18-03-2015 02:13PM

Hope you have some positive attributes.

sbsquarepants · 18-03-2015 02:13PM

Divorce then find a more understanding wife?
Or if you're fond of the one you have, introduce her to watersports. Tell her it's some crappy book or other - chicks love that shít.

Pumpkinseeds · 18-03-2015 02:14PM

Your wife is either a saint or a fool for putting up with it tbh. Honestly, man up and stop getting drunk.

Renegade Mechanic · 18-03-2015 02:15PM

Cormac... wrote: »

There has never been a more fitting thread to say one of those recently banned comments about urine :P

It's too perfect. I can't..

BLAST HER WITH PISS, OP!!!!!!

Avenge meeeeeeeee!!!

Nodin · 18-03-2015 02:17PM

DulchieLaois wrote: »

Hi,

I have a tendancy to sleepwalk when drunk, especially if i want to go to the toilet.

My poor wife keeps waking up and having to guide me to the toilets which is not funny anymore as I can literally go anywhere in the house

any advice please besides drinking less

Thanks

John

As I've heard of two people just pissing from where they stood (living room, standing on bed) I'd say you haven't the worst problem in the world, if that's any consolation.

chakotha · 18-03-2015 02:17PM

Drink vin not beer.

18-03-2015 02:17PM

The only solution is drink less OP!

Generic Dreadhead · 18-03-2015 02:17PM

Renegade Mechanic wrote: »

Avenge meeeeeeeee!!!

I genuinely had a loud laugh at this! :pac:

Gran Hermano · 18-03-2015 02:18PM

Rig up an electric fence to ward you away from the wardrobes and towards the en suite.

DulchieLaois · 18-03-2015 02:21PM

some good laughs , thanks guys !!

what is worse, is that i drank less, wasnt seriously drunk and in fact, went to the toilet for a good 20 minutes before going to bed, just to ensure, i dont have to bother her.

yet all failed !!!

and re drinking, tis down a lot from what i was wild rover in my younger days

BMJD · 18-03-2015 02:23PM

Drink more obviously, the problem only arises when you stop drinking and start sleeping.

Valetta · 18-03-2015 02:24PM

Would it help if you didn't have a wife?

Come back shortly and let us know.

Nino Brown · 18-03-2015 02:26PM

Tell your wife to rub your nose in it and put you outside, you won't be long about learning!

Dramatik · 18-03-2015 03:03PM

A clothes peg should sort it. If that fails try purchasing a garden hose from your local DIY, attach it and leave the other end sitting in the toilet bowl.

SEPT 23 1989 · 18-03-2015 03:12PM

get the wife to put an adult nappy on you

WoollyRedHat · 18-03-2015 03:24PM

Sleep in the bath?

tmh106 · 18-03-2015 03:27PM

Wow, what a helpful bunch

tmh

harry Bailey esq · 18-03-2015 03:28PM

DulchieLaois wrote: »

Hi,

I have a tendancy to sleepwalk when drunk, especially if i want to go to the toilet.

My poor wife keeps waking up and having to guide me to the toilets which is not funny anymore as I can literally go anywhere in the house

any advice please besides drinking less

Thanks

John

Zopiclone

harry Bailey esq · 18-03-2015 03:32PM

Dramatik wrote: »

A clothes peg should sort it. If that fails try purchasing a garden hose from your local DIY, attach it and leave the other end sitting in the toilet bowl.

Sterling advice.

iMac_Hunt · 18-03-2015 03:35PM

I'm in the same boat!!

I was at a stag last weekend and locked myself out of the hotel room. I had to walk to reception in my underpants in order to get a key to get back into the room.

Not my proudest moment!!!!

Stone Deaf 4evr · 18-03-2015 06:07PM

DulchieLaois wrote: »

some good laughs , thanks guys !!

what is worse, is that i drank less, wasnt seriously drunk and in fact, went to the toilet for a good 20 minutes before going to bed, just to ensure, i dont have to bother her.

yet all failed !!!

and re drinking, tis down a lot from what i was wild rover in my younger days

20 mins? :eek: is it number 1's or number 2's that are causing the bother?

it kinda reminds me of the joke about the guy who was fond of the beer,came home an passes out,then woke up only to find himself reincarnated as a chicken. goes about his business on the farmyard and feels and urge coming on him. panicked, he asks the other chickens whats up, and they explain its an egg, to relax and gently push.

next thing he knows all he's hearing is "john, john, you dirty cnut, wake up!, you're sh1tting the bed!"

Rosie Rant · 18-03-2015 06:53PM

Stop drinking. Give your wife a medal.

Sleepwalking to the toilet while Drunk

Welcome!

Comments

Welcome!