The Funny Side of not being straight.

Links234

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9i66D0dIEU

Dr. Baltar

I roared with laughter when I read this article (which is local news to me too) today.

http://waterfordwhispersnews.com/article.php?id=82

crotalus667

Dr. Baltar wrote: »

I roared with laughter when I read this article (which is local news to me too) today.

http://waterfordwhispersnews.com/article.php?id=82

LOL fair play to them for going threw with it :rolleyes:

crotalus667

Links234 wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9i66D0dIEU

sorry but that is just not funny enough to be in stage :rolleyes:

Dr. Baltar

crotalus667 wrote: »

LOL fair play to them for going threw with it :rolleyes:

crotalus667 wrote: »

sorry but that is just not funny enough to be in stage :rolleyes:

Your opinion is appreciated and we love you. You're one of the most individualistic people I haver met in my entire life!!!! :rolleyes:

Links234

http://www.reddit.com/r/transgender/comments/d6ktl/so_the_other_day_while_cuddling_my_girlfriend/

L.Jenkins

Links234 wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9i66D0dIEU

I wish I could thank that twice. I think I just wet myself

CdeC

Me : "Dad, I'm Gay!"

Dad : "Right" *sips tea and thinks

Me: *awkward silence

Dad : "Would you not just have a go of a pair of tits and see how you get on?"

Me :

crotalus667

CdeC wrote: »

Me : "Dad, I'm Gay!"

Dad : "Right" *sips tea and thinks

Me: *awkward silence

Dad : "Would you not just have a go of a pair of tits and see how you get on?"

Me :

PMSL

rainbow kirby

Barna77

rainbow kirby

rainbow kirby

L.Jenkins

I had an incident where i discussed my sexuality with a friend. Being straight and having an attraction to women, he was perplexed at the idea of me becoming a lesbian. I may as well have tried to explain string theory to him. I never heard someone to stutter so much in confusion :P

Links234

it's subtle, but...

Dr. Baltar

John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how handsome John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of Johns' sexual orientation and this only made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and the roommate than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Mark and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Mark came to John and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"

John said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure." So he sat down and wrote: "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you 'did not' take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."

Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read: "Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Mark, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Mark. But the fact remains that if he was sleeping in his own bed, he would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom"

hare05

Dr. Baltar wrote: »

John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how handsome John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of Johns' sexual orientation and this only made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and the roommate than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Mark and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Mark came to John and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"

John said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure." So he sat down and wrote: "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you 'did not' take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."

Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read: "Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Mark, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Mark. But the fact remains that if he was sleeping in his own bed, he would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom"

END THE COMPETITION, CLOSE THE THREAD, WE HAVE A WINNER!

rainbow kirby

deirdre_dub

I was on the DART on my way into town. I was sitting on the seat beside the aisle. Between me and the window there was a woman, and she was talking to her two friends who were in the two seats facing us.

The DART pulled into a station, and I was just minding my own business, when, next thing, the woman beside me, bold as brass, says "I can't tell if that is a man or a woman". Eeek. :eek:

Nervously, I look in her direction. She is pointing out the window at a pony-tail haired person who is standing on the platform outside - she isn't referring to me at all!!!

I had thought if I should introduce myself! Although a better suggestion came from one of my friends, who said that I should have joined in and said "yeah, it can be difficult to tell sometimes"!

baby and crumble

Don't know if it's funny, but it's certainly something!

http://www.autostraddle.com/effing-dykes-what-lies-beneath-her-nails-68129/

:eek::eek::eek::eek: (I posted this in TLL, so apologies if people have seen it before...)

DS333

Dr. Baltar wrote: »

John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how handsome John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of Johns' sexual orientation and this only made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and the roommate than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Mark and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Mark came to John and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"

John said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure." So he sat down and wrote: "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you 'did not' take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."

Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read: "Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Mark, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Mark. But the fact remains that if he was sleeping in his own bed, he would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom"

Thanks, Dr. Baltar,

That is brilliant. I'll dine out on that instead of the Jack Russell and the bunny rabbit in future.

Chuchoter

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKb3L6bukm0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-4w6NqfLAc

baby and crumble

God I love that 'perils of lesbianity' one. SO GOOD every time I watch it!!

Dr. Baltar

Posted in Is It Wrong to Be Gay? and an old favourite of mine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjnrLt3VuSM

How do people believe this poo poo?

wonderfulname

Yeahh... when you think about it, that's not funny.

Dr. Baltar

wonderfulname wrote: »

Yeahh... when you think about it, that's not funny.

I understand how the wider picture is; how it's extremely oppressive for LGBT people in Uganda and how terrible it must be. But this thread is about ignoring all that and trying to find the humour in everything even if it is people like the Westboro Baptist Church and idiotic Ugandan Homophobes.

Sesudra

My OH told his sister he was gay a few years ago

OH-So,I'm gay
Sister-Right...you know X from down the road is a lesbian don't you?
OH-Oh yeah,I'd heard that.
Sister-Well,you're both gay,could ye not get together?
OH-.............

Links234

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIcrCZQkSlg

wonderfulname

Links, I've been passively looking for that clip for bloody ages thank you!

Links234

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msonq5VR1ec

Dr. Baltar

Links234 wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msonq5VR1ec

I don't know why but I laughed for about 5 minutes after that!

Dr. Baltar

I couldn't find a better quality clip anywhere unfortunately.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icIwKaci3MI

Oh and also!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BuR5YMyfeNI

Killer_banana

That Simpsons clip brings back memories. I remember being very little and not understanding the majority of that episode because I didn't know what the word gay meant. =P

I remember when my friends next door neighbour found out I was bi. He was only about twelve at the time (I was fifteen) and didn't know much about the whole thing. He asked 'But how do you know you're bisexual?' I replied 'Well how do you know you're straight?' Poor guy thought I was questioning his sexuality and got very defensive. =P

Another time I caused the problem. Was at a house party and sitting outside having a smoke with a friend who's also bi. We were talking about what we look or in both genders when our male friend came out. I asked what he looked for in a girl and he just shrugged and changed subject. About fifteen minutes later he blurted out 'I'm gay.' Problem was I'm a spacy person, especially when I think of a good point to make in a discussion so my reply 'Yeah so anyway *insert whatever we were talking about here*' Poor guy had to come out to me again the same night 'cause I didn't hear him the first time.

Edit:I don't think I've ever said 'poor guy' before in my life yet I somehow managed to used it twice in one post.

Barna77

I came out to my parents and brother over christmas. My mam said it's was fine as long as I'm happy, but she also said that now it's kind of cool to have a gay son. And this is the first thing that crossed my mind

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46WSydfCMSQ

:lol

I'm a godsent!

SparkyTech

My mum was a bit disappointed I didn't want to go shopping with her in the recent sales for a wedding piece (apparently the chicle of every young hip and happening gay son! )

Also this song and corresponding video.....

wonderfulname

This post just turned up in "You laugh, you lose".

shannon_tek

during my up down years of .. > privious history im not bi or gay:eek: . i told a friend when i was that i was bi. first thing he asked me , "what eyebrow should i get pierced. is left straight and right gay?'. I didnt know what the hell to say , twas the first i heard of it:D. Lol but does it really matter??:p

diddlybit

I only recently came out to my parents as my mother can be a little funny about bisexuality.

I'd been seeing my girlfreind for a couple of months when she emmigrated to Canada. I spent all savings on a long-haul fligh to see her for a month which was quite unusual for me, as a avid smoker, the idea of 17 hours without a cigarette fills me with fear.

On my return and a couple of glasses of wine:

Her: So did you meet any nice fellas over there?
Me: No. Ma, I'm kind of seeing "girlfriend's name"
Her: What do you mean seeing? As in gay seeing?
Me: Yeah
Her: As in gay?
Me: Yeah
Her: Loooong pause and chicken arse face... I don't think you're gay.
Me: Why not?
Her: You're not gay. You just like trying new things.

First thing that pops into my head is "Trying new things? What like *insert crude word here to describe lady bits*?!?"

Thankfully, that last one didn't come out of my mouth.

rainbow kirby

Fozzydog3

My friend was telling my other russian friend whos not the most liberal person known to man that i was gay and his description of his reaction was

"it was exactly like a child finding out santa wasn't real "

Dr. Baltar

Fozzydog3 wrote: »

My friend was telling my other russian friend whos not the most liberal person known to man that i was gay and his description of his reaction was

"it was exactly like a child finding out santa wasn't real "

Housemate of mine was from Lithuania and not the most gay friendly person. So one day a couple of my friends came over (they're straight) and when he walked in they all started saying things like "oh he is cute!" "oh yeah" ect. ect.
I was mortified but it was nothing compared to him who just walked to the fridge stared inside for about 10 seconds and walked back to his room.

DubArk

Fozzydog3 wrote: »

".....finding out santa wasn't real "

:eek::eek::eek:

Dr. Baltar

DubArk wrote: »

:eek::eek::eek:

wasn't real... really that fond of snow!!!!

Don't worry! :pac:

Aishae

:pac:theres no shortage of happy to be gay stories!

when i came out to my mam and dad i was 21 or 22 - i says to her one night 'so. im gay' she laughs and says she knew that ages ago. i ask her how flippin long she knew. she said since i was a young teen. so i says 'so you kne beforei did and never thought to tell me you b*tch?!' we slag each other off with the bitch word for effect. but upon reflection - i think it may have been my obsession with captain janeway of star trek voyager that told her.
hadnt accepted it myself til 20. so it was funny in a sort of 'oh for f*ckssake' kinda way.

a few years ago i was in carlow shopping with the folks. this girl walks past in small denim shorts - almost knee high boots. bit crazy. but she had the as$ for it. my jaw dropped, maybe i drooled a bit. i was walking beside dad at the time. i looked over at him in a sorta 'cor' knowing way. HES looking jaw dropped too at her. looks over at me in the same way. we laugh our asses off. never leered before or since in such an eye popping public way. the woman had her back to us (A1 view) which is probably a good thing unless she likes being appreciated!

Killer_banana

I remember last year sitting in the corridor in school and me and one friend were joking about how we seemed to attract bi people since we have a lot of bi friends, the majority of whom hadn't come out when we met them originally. Our other friend asked how many we had and I started naming them out while counting them off on my fingers. I named myself, forgetting she didn't know I was (just never came up). she said 'You're bi?!' really loudly. We then realised that our guidance counselor was standing right behind us. She stood unsure of what to say for about ten seconds and then just handed us sheets and walked off.

rainbow kirby

Chuchoter

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYLdM8wXkzM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jnvgq8STMGM

rainbow kirby

^ Love Sassy Gay Friend

Aard

Never seen Disappointing GBF before, but thank you CS love it.

Barna77

Aard wrote: »

Never seen Disappointing GBF before, but thank you CS love it.

Agreed.

It's funny cause it's true