Romantic or stalkerish?

hes only a stalker if he faps into the flowers

Why send her flowers?

What's wrong with a good old-fashioned bag of lime?

I think it's stalkerish if the man persists with the contact when the woman has made it clear she's not interested.

Witchie wrote: »

Personally, having had a few stalkers (and I mean real ones where Gardai have been informed) I think sending flowers to the house is a no no but wouldnt be so bad if you sent them to her work. That would be less threatening and invasive.

This is something I really don't understand, the whole definition of a stalker is that the persons behaviour is extraordinarily obsessive, so for a person to have "a few" stalkers, there has to be something up with their behavior, either they're leading the "stalker" on, or sending mixed signals.

I mean I can understand someone getting stalked by 1 person... Getting stalked by 2 people is really pushing it but if a person is continually complaining to the Guards about stalkers, surely they're the one who's bat **** crazy...

Witchie wrote: »

Personally, having had a few stalkers (and I mean real ones where Gardai have been informed) I think sending flowers to the house is a no no but wouldnt be so bad if you sent them to her work. That would be less threatening and invasive.

Excuse me?!

You've had the misfortune of having not just one but having had a few stalkers

And these few were so bad you had to go to the guards :eek:

Frankly, I don't believe you.

Or else I think you are encouraging people and when it goes too far you are shouting wolf/stalker :rolleyes:

Alter-Ego wrote: »

I know 2 girls who have had multiple stalkers. Some girls just attract them.

One of the girls can't work in pubs any more because that's where they seemed to latch onto her, following her after work etc..

Any girls I know who "attract" stalkers actually tend to be overly friendly and flirty and god forbid when the fella asks them out they get labelled a stalker.

bonerm wrote: »

Ah the mix-tape! One of those rituals that was (thankfully) lost to technological progress.

You are right, though I guess nowadays we're meant to send mixes compiled in iTunes and confess our undying love via a podcast


Which reminds me where the hell did I put my eight track??








p.s. that wasn't a flirtatious winky, you wont be getting no podcasts from me brah. though I would like to send you some flowers

weird eh?

nomh wrote: »

Being stalked is romantic. I wish someone was devoted enough to me to sit outside my house at night.

If the gardai suspect you of a serious crime you might get your wish

stalking is something that's constant, persistent and against the persons wishes, not a nice thing at all, I wouldn't define the flowers at the house scenario as stalkerish.

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

You would be one in a hundred.

I think it really does boil down to looks as well really.

I think the looks thing applies to both genders, because if a Kelly Brook or Christina Hendricks lookalike was following a bloke around he wouldn't exactly mind.

I dont think looks has to do with it and you can be stalked by someone you know well which I have had problems with before and it was pretty nasty, I'd welcome flowers from a stranger at the house over that.

bonerm wrote: »

Ah the mix-tape! One of those rituals that was (thankfully) lost to technological progress.

I've always wondered (after all the thought and effort that goes into making one) what percentage of mix-tapes actually went unlistened to by their recipient?

I'd guess 99%

"Stalking" is something that I would consider really, really serious, where the person being stalked is actually at risk of being hurt.

There's a massive difference between someone being weirdly persistent and a stalker. Also, the majority of "stalkers" are people with whom you've had previous contact (ex's, friends etc.) so I don't buy the whole "Omg he sent me flowers he's a stalker." The most it would be is a bit weird.

All these scenarios are completely subjective anyway y'know?

Also mixed tapes for the win! I LOVE mixed tapes. A boy once seriously did win my heart over with a mixed tape now that I think about it!

Hail 2 Da Chimp wrote: »

This is something I really don't understand, the whole definition of a stalker is that the persons behaviour is extraordinarily obsessive, so for a person to have "a few" stalkers, there has to be something up with their behavior, either they're leading the "stalker" on, or sending mixed signals.

I mean I can understand someone getting stalked by 1 person... Getting stalked by 2 people is really pushing it but if a person is continually complaining to the Guards about stalkers, surely they're the one who's bat **** crazy...

Am crazy but not that kinda crazy. You can't assume to know anything about my situation. I think i do attract slightly weird guys and coz I don't want to be a Bitch, I am nice to them. I reported one to guards and other situations i have just dealt with myself.

When i was in college i broke up with a guy from home. He used to get a bus to Dublin every day and b sitting on the wall across from my apartment every morning when I would b going to college. He would be there when I came home and would head home on last bus. He would put letters and poems under my door. Went on for weeks until he saw me with a new bf.

There have been other incidents including a guy who pinned me against a wall in a nite club telling me who I was, where i lived and what he wanted to do to me that scared me for ages.

Another guy, having been told I wasn't interested started putting notes through my letter box and on my car in the middle of the nite and even showed up at my door when i had just arrived home from an event with my kids....at midnight. He had been parked outside when I arrived home. I told him if he ever came to my house again i would call the guards and he backed off.

The one I did involve the guards in, i cant go into.

Another guy claimed to know where i lived and said he was outside watching me with my sons.

There have been others who won't take no for an answer and I have had to change my phone no to shake off but they were minor.

So maybe I shouldn't talk to random strangers and show some kindness coz thinking back its only caused me grief.

You're all giving stalkers a bad name. It take a lot of time and patience to achieve uber stalker status.

Edit: not to mention the cost involved in the presents and thousands of texts.

What if I ring a girl I like and anxiety causes my asthma to kick in, followed by several seconds of heavy breathing where I can't say anything, so I hang up. This process is then repeated in a futile attempt to get over my nerves.



Also i'm naked in her bushes.

Swampy wrote: »

You're all giving stalkers a bad name. It take a lot of time and patience to achieve uber stalker status.

Edit: not to mention the cost involved in the presents and thousands of texts.

I bet it does. Lots and lots of practice.

In answer to the question, it is stalking. Because the sub-text is 'I know where you live'.

Mammanabammana wrote: »

There may be FAR more truth in this than most people are willing to admit!

According to Hollywood...