Why would anyone want to get married??

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:07AM #1

I never want to. Any other girls or guys agree with me? The thought of it turns my stomach!

Mena · 31-08-2013 07:13AM

You'll understand when you're all growd up.

/pat

kneemos · 31-08-2013 07:13AM

The Communion dress.

mikemac1 · 31-08-2013 07:13AM

Tax credits!

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:14AM

I am all grown up.

bizmark · 31-08-2013 07:15AM

Cause you love someone if you dont understand that then i feel deeply sorry for you

Rosy Posy · 31-08-2013 07:15AM

- great party with all our families and friends (we were one of the first of our friends to get married so everyone was still really enthusiastic)

- wanted to have the same last name as our kids- made us feel like a family.

- felt like our relationship changed- we were in it for the long haul- we still have fights but ultimately we know we are going to work on it and make it right.

- legitimised our relationship in the eyes of our more old fashioned family members- my parents in particular were never at ease with us having kids out of wedlock/living in 'sin'

-sounds corny but it really was the happiest day of my life!

Those were my reasons but I can fully understand not being into it... Whatever floats your boat...

zenno · 31-08-2013 07:16AM

What ever you do, do not sacrifice your life to a contract. Making a deal with the devil

you can love a person 100% without having to sell your soul.

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:17AM

bizmark wrote: »

Cause you love someone if you dont understand that then i feel deeply sorry for you

I do understand that, but if I love someone that doesn't necessarily mean I have to go and get married! It's my choice, I don't understand how you would feel sorry for me about a choice I make!

bizmark · 31-08-2013 07:21AM

you didn't make a choice or at lest didn't word your question as such you asked a question and i answered it with my own view point on it and your seeming lack of understanding of why someone would get married.

Tbh it just speaks volumes of the selfish me me me short sighted crap our so called culture has turned into.

Imho anyway

theteal · 31-08-2013 07:21AM

Because she says so!

/thread

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:22AM

Rosy Posy wrote: »

- great party with all our families and friends (we were one of the first of our friends to get married so everyone was still really enthusiastic)

- wanted to have the same last name as our kids- made us feel like a family.

- felt like our relationship changed- we were in it for the long haul- we still have fights but ultimately we know we are going to work on it and make it right.

- legitimised our relationship in the eyes of our more old fashioned family members- my parents in particular were never at ease with us having kids out of wedlock/living in 'sin'

-sounds corny but it really was the happiest day of my life!

Those were my reasons but I can fully understand not being into it... Whatever floats your boat...

I appreciate and respect your opinion, and thanks for your contribution. The reasons you stated are of course why many people get married, and all that, which is understandable.

I'm the opposite though. Been stuck with the one person for the rest of your life. If children come along, you are completely stuck with that person - even if you love them.

To me, its a ball and chain for life, effectively signing your life away bound legally, which also puts me off it.

I have seen far too many marriages that are in absolute despair, and many many people cheating to see its the last thing I would do in my life. My opinion anyways.

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:23AM

zenno wrote: »

What ever you do, do not sacrifice your life to a contract. Making a deal with the devil you can love a person 100% without having to sell your soul.

I agree 100%.

kneemos · 31-08-2013 07:24AM

Some people might feel safer in a marriage in that it's harder to get out of,I suppose.

stoneill · 31-08-2013 07:24AM

When you love someone and you make a pledge in front of your friends and family, and if you are that way inclined, in front of whatever god you believe in that you love this person so much, that you will spend the rest of your lives together.

That's why.

Caonima · 31-08-2013 07:25AM

Didn't want to get married, but my GF got pregnant and in this country a baby needs to have married parents or it loses a lot of its entitlements, so I tied the knot. Civil ceremony, though; none of that "By the power vested in me..." garbage.

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:27AM

bizmark wrote: »

you didn't make a choice or at lest didn't word your question as such you asked a question and i answered it with my own view point on it and your seeming lack of understanding of why someone would get married.

Tbh it just speaks volumes of the selfish me me me short sighted crap our so called culture has turned into.

Imho anyway

I understand why people get married. I asked if anyone else would not want to get married, and who agreed with me.

You say our culture, my choice of never wanting to get married doesn't make me selfish however.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 31-08-2013 07:27AM

For Legal reasons I'd be turned off it. Take USA for eg, up to half your worth:eek:. For eg Tiger Woods wife walked away with 700 million in cash plus assets such as homes cars companies etc. Now take it back a swing, she was an illegal Au Pair working for Jesper Parnevik (A Swedish Golf Pro) when she met him. She wasn't even qualified. Tiger worked all his life to achieve success at his game, their home life was terrible by all accounts, she treated him badly, he went out and got laid elsewhere and then she does that to him.

Money must draw that type of leech.

Caonima · 31-08-2013 07:29AM

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

For Legal reasons I'd be turned off it. Take USA for eg, up to half your worth:eek:. For eg Tiger Woods wife walked away with 700 million in cash plus assets such as homes cars companies etc. Now take it back a swing, she was an illegal Au Pair working for Jesper Parnevik (A Swedish Golf Pro) when she met him. She wasn't even qualified. Tiger worked all his life to achieve success at his game, their home life was terrible by all accounts, she treated him badly, he went out and got laid elsewhere and then she does that to him.

RachaelVO · 31-08-2013 07:30AM

Being married aint all that bad ya know.

TBF it doesn't mean that your relationship won't break down, nor does it mean that you will never row again. It's just another step in the relationship ladder that some want to take and some don't. It's a way to formalise everything, you say in front of friends and family, I'm committed to this person, and the family we have or will have.

Besides which it was a fecking great day, such a laugh and I had my friends and family (basically everyone I love) all in the one room, and it's not something that happens too often.

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:32AM

stoneill wrote: »

When you love someone and you make a pledge in front of your friends and family, and if you are that way inclined, in front of whatever god you believe in that you love this person so much, that you will spend the rest of your lives together.

That's why.

People do this on their wedding day, and love the person with all their heart, and want a future together. I'm very put off with the entire the idea of marriage, as there are so many people unhappy in marriages, cheating, separating, then stuck with kids, and are stuck being married to someone who in many years to come, you end up fairly unhappy, - not all marriages, but so very many marriages I have seen.

My point is, why people would want to get married in this day and age with all of the above, and divorce increasing. I have seen more unhappy marriages than I have seen happy marriages.

myshirt · 31-08-2013 07:32AM

Me: "What's that smell?"
Wife: "I can't smell anything"
Me: "Neither can I, now get that f#cking cooker on"

That's why you married a girl in the past. It rubber stamped your legal, moral and rightful right to that lady.

Nowadays, the whole thing is hampered by the availability of divorce. The sanctity of the institution is ruined.

For example, when a couple get divorced, the man has to pay his ex-wife a share of his future earnings, but the woman doesn't have to do the man's future housework?

Tell me how that is right. Disgraceful.

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:33AM

Caonima wrote: »

Didn't want to get married, but my GF got pregnant and in this country a baby needs to have married parents or it loses a lot of its entitlements, so I tied the knot. Civil ceremony, though; none of that "By the power vested in me..." garbage.

I agree. I don't understand in a couple spending a fortune on one day in their life, inviting people they wouldn't see or speak to that much?

bizmark · 31-08-2013 07:34AM

myshirt wrote: »

Me: "What's that smell?"
Wife: "I can't smell anything"
Me: "Neither can I, now get that f#cking cooker on"

That's why you married a girl in the past. It rubber stamped your legal, moral and rightful right to that lady.

Nowadays, the whole thing is hampered by the availability of divorce. The sanctity of the institution is ruined.

For example, when a couple get divorced, the man has to pay his ex-wife a share of his future earnings, but the woman doesn't have to do the man's future housework?

Tell me how that is right. Disgraceful.

lol right on bro !

nicegirl · 31-08-2013 07:35AM

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

For Legal reasons I'd be turned off it. Take USA for eg, up to half your worth:eek:. For eg Tiger Woods wife walked away with 700 million in cash plus assets such as homes cars companies etc. Now take it back a swing, she was an illegal Au Pair working for Jesper Parnevik (A Swedish Golf Pro) when she met him. She wasn't even qualified. Tiger worked all his life to achieve success at his game, their home life was terrible by all accounts, she treated him badly, he went out and got laid elsewhere and then she does that to him.

Money must draw that type of leech.

Excellent point, thanks

Synyster Shadow · 31-08-2013 07:35AM

I agree with rosy posy.
I see it as you either want to or not. I wanted to and for me it's the right choice. I know plenty that don't want to and they shouldn't.

Iv a little boy and baby on the way and I would hate to have a different name to them also I wanted there dad to have equal rights to me when it came to them. (mother gets biggest say when not married even with dad on birth cert, sad but true iv seen it all)

So each to there own

Edit: kids weren't even conceived before marriage so that's secondary reason I might never of gotten pregnant

Seamus1964 · 31-08-2013 07:37AM

Old man told me once
that
being married or just living together is like keeping backdoor locked or unlocked ..
If you are married you can't just walk away every time when your emotions kicks in

RachaelVO · 31-08-2013 07:37AM

nicegirl wrote: »

My point is, why people would want to get married in this day and age with all of the above, and divorce increasing. I have seen more unhappy marriages than I have seen happy marriages.

Maybe it's just the unhappy ones that stand out more, due to the drama they usually cause. I don't see it happen too often, in fact in my family and friends there are very few unhappy marriages. I've seen some people just get married for the sake of it, or far too quickly, and then the don't try to work on their issues. That does happen.

Being in a relationship whether married or not takes work. Once the hearts and flowers part of being in a new relationship wears off you see someone warts and all, and they you.

RachaelVO · 31-08-2013 07:40AM

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

For Legal reasons I'd be turned off it. Take USA for eg, up to half your worth:eek:. For eg Tiger Woods wife walked away with 700 million in cash plus assets such as homes cars companies etc. Now take it back a swing, she was an illegal Au Pair working for Jesper Parnevik (A Swedish Golf Pro) when she met him. She wasn't even qualified. Tiger worked all his life to achieve success at his game, their home life was terrible by all accounts, she treated him badly, he went out and got laid elsewhere and then she does that to him.

Money must draw that type of leech.

Jesus... Tiger Woods shagging lots of women and increasing the risk of bringing home an STD to the mother of his kids. Yep she was totally in the wrong :rolleyes:

Bylar Bear · 31-08-2013 07:40AM

I never want to. Any other girls or guys agree with me? The thought of it turns my stomach!

Oh lord. Here we go. Another selfish person looking for people to validate their beliefs and or fears on the internet. Clearly you have never loved somebody enough, nor been loved by somebody enough, to have wanted to spend the rest of your life with them.

It is obvious as well from your other posts that you cannot think or care about the concerns for anybody except your own.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 31-08-2013 07:45AM

RachaelVO wrote: »

Jesus... Tiger Woods shagging lots of women and increasing the risk of bringing home an STD to the mother of his kids. Yep she was totally in the wrong :rolleyes:

Please, the marriage had broken down at that stage, and Tiger frequented high end joints only.

Why would anyone want to get married??

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