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Oh oh. Trouble

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Comments

  • #502
    Arbiter of Good Taste
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,200 ✭✭✭Arbiter of Good Taste


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Do I need to do that though. Surely doing this for her should be motivation enough. Or have i more of a problem ahead than I realise?

    Why not? What's the problem? Surely if you say you're motivated to quit the gambling then you should be happy to do this. Or do you have it in the back of your mind that you might like the opportunity to pop in once and a while. Be honest with yourself.


  • #503
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    You know I read stuff on after hours all the time and I always think it's full of lads just taking the p*** but this has been so good for me. lot of people here have been a rock of sense with great ideas and support


  • #504
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    Big Bag of Chips wrote: »
    My friend that I mentioned above is in the Waterford group of GA...

    I will look into GA today. Step 3


  • #505
    maguic24
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,790 ✭✭✭maguic24


    carraig2 wrote: »
    You know I read stuff on after hours all the time and I always think it's full of lads just taking the p*** but this has been so good for me. lot of people here have been a rock of sense with great ideas and support

    I'm quite surprised too! Looking for good advice on After Hours is usually like trying to get blood from a stone. I thought you were trolling OP, after hours would be the last place I'd go for advice and the first place I'd go for a laugh. :P


  • #506
    runawaybishop
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,521 ✭✭✭runawaybishop


    carraig2 wrote: »
    No not for a while. Used to pay indoor soccer but could drop dead if I tried it now. A hobby hmmmmmm does joining the lads in the pub count.
    Getting back into shape is a good hobby. Its a stress reliever, it'll lift your mood, it'll help you live longer and you'll look like a beast. Join a gym or/buy some home equipment and lift stuff.


  • #507
    Renegade Mechanic
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,934 ✭✭✭Renegade Mechanic


    carraig2 wrote: »
    You know I read stuff on after hours all the time and I always think it's full of lads just taking the p*** but this has been so good for me. lot of people here have been a rock of sense with great ideas and support

    You are doing well mate, delighted to hear she is open to ideas. As mentioned, show her proof of your complete obliteration of all accounts, apps, channels, numbers, everything. As per wibbs, I probably wouldnt go all out with a massive romantic gesture as it would likely be seen the wrong way. But thats not to say a nice little meal out and long talk wouldnt help a lot.

    And of course,
    sudden-realization-model-meme-generator-gambled-on-a-fart-lost-b9a2c0.jpg?1329633182.jpg


  • #508
    howamidifferent
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,819 ✭✭✭howamidifferent


    carraig2 wrote: »
    You know I read stuff on after hours all the time and I always think it's full of lads just taking the p*** but this has been so good for me. lot of people here have been a rock of sense with great ideas and support

    This and the "My Wife Is Dying" thread show that not all people are pricks all of the time.... :o


  • #509
    Arbiter of Good Taste
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,200 ✭✭✭Arbiter of Good Taste


    carraig2 wrote: »
    A hobby hmmmmmm does joining the lads in the pub count.

    Funny how your initial reaction was about spending more time with "the lads". You'll probably say it was just a joke but it's very telling to me. Why don't you find a hobby that includes your partner? Presumably you spend a lot of time with your children and mother (rightly so). Do you think your partner will appreciate you heading out a few nights a week to play football on top of that? You're in a relationship, why not spend more time together?


  • #510
    globalwarrior
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 74 ✭✭globalwarrior


    I live in Australia, we have free gambling counseling here - in fact that is what I do for a living.

    You were lucky thing time that she stayed you might not be so lucky the next time. seek out some counseling, address the underlying issues... and self exclude, self exclude wherever possible.

    I deal with this issue everyday, it is progressive and will only get worse if not attacked at all levels.

    Most important thing, keep the lines of conversations open with your partner.

    Talk it out, talk it out and keep talking it out. People do recover, quitting is a process not an event, never ever underestimate its pull or take your recovery for granted.

    You can do it - one day at time


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  • #511
    Arbiter of Good Taste
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,200 ✭✭✭Arbiter of Good Taste


    Oh, and good for you looking into GA. It's not easy admitting you might have an addiction.


  • #512
    maguic24
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,790 ✭✭✭maguic24


    Arbiter of Good Taste wrote: »
    Funny how your initial reaction was about spending more time with "the lads". You'll probably say it was just a joke but it's very telling to me. Why don't you find a hobby that includes your partner? Presumably you spend a lot of time with your children and mother (rightly so). Do you think your partner will appreciate you heading out a few nights a week to play football on top of that? You're in a relationship, why not spend more time together?

    I think the 5 a side is a good idea, I also think maybe the OP should encourage his partner to start a hobby as well. A different hobby where she can also make new friends.

    I like running, so does my bf. We run together. But I'm going to start badminton just so I can make new friends and because well I want to. Yes, I think the OP should spend more time with his partner but I think it is also a good idea for them both to have separate hobbies and separate groups they can mix with from time to time. Just my 2 cents. I thought date night was a good idea but I also think 5 a side soccer would be great once or twice a week. It's exercise and it's the potential for new friendships. When you are trying to curb an addiction you need to have another outlet.

    OP will need to fill his spare time as he won't be gambling, 5 a side 1 or 2 nights a week and date night is doable. I just think it is healthy to have a hobby that is separate from your partner. It is very hard to mix with other people, when you join clubs as a couple. Just my opinion, feel free to disagree.


  • #513
    inforfun
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,863 ✭✭✭✭inforfun


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Yeah I totally see her point. My accounts are all closed and that's it now. Turned on boards this morning, following 9 threads. 5 are gambling. My normal thing is to check them first. So I gotta unsubscribe now. That's second step.

    PM me if you want to have the acces to gambling threads completely gone.

    And best of luck.


  • #514
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    Arbiter of Good Taste wrote: »
    Funny how your initial reaction was about spending more time with "the lads". You'll probably say it was just a joke but it's very telling to me. Why don't you find a hobby that includes your partner? Presumably you spend a lot of time with your children and mother (rightly so). Do you think your partner will appreciate you heading out a few nights a week to play football on top of that? You're in a relationship, why not spend more time together?

    No, my reaction was I have no hobbies, no life that does not revolve around the mates and the pub. That is very telling to me. When did I let my life be about work and pub? TaxAHcruel said something about filling a vaccuum. Think he/she was right. Not saying I gambled out of boredom but I bet having no structure to my evenings didn't help.

    Ok step 4 find a hobby


  • #515
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    carraig2 wrote: »
    No, my reaction was I have no hobbies, no life that does not revolve around the mates and the pub. That is very telling to me. When did I let my life be about work and pub? TaxAHcruel said something about filling a vaccuum. Think he/she was right. Not saying I gambled out of boredom but I bet having no structure to my evenings didn't help.

    Ok step 4 find a hobby

    Oops:D


  • #516
    Mr Boom Boom
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 97 ✭✭Mr Boom Boom


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Yeah I totally see her point. My accounts are all closed and that's it now. Turned on boards this morning, following 9 threads. 5 are gambling. My normal thing is to check them first. So I gotta unsubscribe now. That's second step.

    You should request that you are banned from the forums. Am sure the mods will accommodate


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  • #517
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    Mr Boom Boom wrote: »
    You should request that you are banned from the forums. Am sure the mods will accommodate

    Just pm'd the mod asking for that.


  • #518
    Arbiter of Good Taste
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,200 ✭✭✭Arbiter of Good Taste


    maguic24 wrote: »
    I just think it is healthy to have a hobby that is separate from your partner. It is very hard to mix with other people, when you join clubs as a couple. Just my opinion, feel free to disagree.

    I absolutely agree - to me, there is nothing worse than a couple tied at the hip 24/7. I suppose the point I was trying to make was that the OPs partner appears to be low on his priority list already. He already had some important resposibilities which are non negotiable, so he likely doesn't have the luxury of much spare time. No different than most people with children.

    I suspect that the OP spent a lot of time gambling online at home, creating the illusion that he was spending a lot of time at home with his partner. I think the OP just needs to be careful that he doesn't fill the void to such an extent that his new hobby just replaces his gambling as something of higher priority than his partner.


  • #519
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    Arbiter of Good Taste wrote: »
    I absolutely agree - to me, there is nothing worse than a couple tied at the hip 24/7. I suppose the point I was trying to make was that the OPs partner appears to be low on his priority list already. He already had some important resposibilities which are non negotiable, so he likely doesn't have the luxury of much spare time. No different than most people with children.

    I suspect that the OP spent a lot of time gambling online at home, creating the illusion that he was spending a lot of time at home with his partner. I think the OP just needs to be careful that he doesn't fill the void to such an extent that his new hobby just replaces his gambling as something of higher priority than his partner.

    Good sir or good lady you are so right. I think there is a possibility that could happen. Thank you for pointing that out at the start so I will make sure it doesn't.


  • #520
    Arbiter of Good Taste
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,200 ✭✭✭Arbiter of Good Taste


    Glad to be of assistance. Hope everything works out, and not too many bumps along the way


  • #521
    irish_goat
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 5,886 Mod ✭✭✭✭irish_goat


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Just pm'd the mod asking for that.

    That's the boring way to do it. Shoulda went in all guns blazing and got yourself banned the proper way.


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  • #522
    maguic24
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,790 ✭✭✭maguic24


    Arbiter of Good Taste wrote: »
    I absolutely agree - to me, there is nothing worse than a couple tied at the hip 24/7. I suppose the point I was trying to make was that the OPs partner appears to be low on his priority list already. He already had some important resposibilities which are non negotiable, so he likely doesn't have the luxury of much spare time. No different than most people with children.

    I suspect that the OP spent a lot of time gambling online at home, creating the illusion that he was spending a lot of time at home with his partner. I think the OP just needs to be careful that he doesn't fill the void to such an extent that his new hobby just replaces his gambling as something of higher priority than his partner.

    I never actually thought of that! That's a really good point. I apologise, I misinterpreted what you were saying.


  • #523
    inforfun
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,863 ✭✭✭✭inforfun


    irish_goat wrote: »
    That's the boring way to do it. Shoulda went in all guns blazing and got yourself banned the proper way.

    Yeah....NO.

    :p


  • #524
    V_Moth
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,423 ✭✭✭V_Moth


    carraig2 wrote: »
    No, my reaction was I have no hobbies, no life that does not revolve around the mates and the pub. That is very telling to me. When did I let my life be about work and pub? TaxAHcruel said something about filling a vaccuum. Think he/she was right. Not saying I gambled out of boredom but I bet having no structure to my evenings didn't help.

    Ok step 4 find a hobby

    Here is something:

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057130398

    Or if you are not in Dublin, BirdWatch Ireland have branches throughout Ireland who organise regular events. Or why not hiking? Ireland has some many great areas - there really is no need to sit inside the pub :)


  • #525
    josip
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,633 ✭✭✭✭josip


    V_Moth wrote: »
    Here is something:

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057130398

    Or if you are not in Dublin, BirdWatch Ireland have branches throughout Ireland who organise regular events. Or why not hiking? Ireland has some many great areas - there really is no need to sit inside the pub :)

    Or head off to the Guillomene for a refreshing dip :D


  • #526
    FourFourRED
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,836 ✭✭✭FourFourRED


    Any tips for the races today, OP?


  • #527
    Pedro K
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,210 ✭✭✭Pedro K


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Just pm'd the mod asking for that.

    You can also have yourself excluded from the shops and your accounts.

    Probably worth doing.

    I worked in the gambling industry for nearly two years. It is a pox. An absolutely sick industry.


  • #528
    Akrasia
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 23,103 ✭✭✭✭Akrasia


    How much did you spend on bets a week roughly?
    Maybe you could put that cash into a jar or something and use it to go out on a date (with her, not someone else) once a month?
    Something to focus the mind on what you are gaining from giving up the gambling?


  • #529
    runawaybishop
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,521 ✭✭✭runawaybishop


    Akrasia wrote: »
    How much did you spend on bets a week roughly?
    Maybe you could put that cash into a jar or something and use it to go out on a date (with her, not someone else) once a month?
    Something to focus the mind on what you are gaining from giving up the gambling?

    When you give up something that costs money, such as smoking, gambling, drinking etc its a great idea to stick the cash you would have spent into a jar and then treat yourself/herself with it.


  • #530
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    Pedro K wrote: »
    You can also have yourself excluded from the shops and your accounts.

    Probably worth doing.

    I worked in the gambling industry for nearly two years. It is a pox. An absolutely sick industry.

    Really. What way? Hardly any worse than alcohol industry


  • #531
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    Akrasia wrote: »
    How much did you spend on bets a week roughly?
    Maybe you could put that cash into a jar or something and use it to go out on a date (with her, not someone else) once a month?
    Something to focus the mind on what you are gaining from giving up the gambling?

    Great idea. Will do that. I spent between 50 and 80 a week. Some weeks less, never more than that but I could lose more. Like I could lose my winnings which could amount to more


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  • #532
    fibix
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 400 ✭✭fibix


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Hardly any worse than alcohol industry

    Well, haven't worked for bookies but would kill for a job in Diageo, one of the best companies to work for.


  • #533
    Big Bag of Chips
    Administrators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 15,308 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Really. What way? Hardly any worse than alcohol industry

    Try not to go down the route of justifying it! The alcohol industry is a nice, enjoyable, leisure industry for those who can handle it. For those that can't it can lead to them losing everything.

    Gambling is no different. There are people who are quite happy to enjoy the odd bet, and not get sucked in. And then there are people who can't limit it to that, and it leads to them losing everything.

    You're not quite at that point yet, you have to be given credit for the steps you've taken so far. Just make sure you realise how close you are to that tipping point.

    Money lenders are never a good sign!


  • #534
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    carraig2 wrote: »
    TaxAHcruel said something about filling a vaccuum. Think he/she was right. Not saying I gambled out of boredom but I bet having no structure to my evenings didn't help.

    Thanks - my advice is anecdotally based of course and would not replace what a real addiction counsellor might offer you - but it is odd that some years ago I started putting up notices in the local colleges that I wanted to give - for want of a better word here as this is not the correct one - "lessons" or "classes" in Vipassana Meditation to students for free.

    So the idea was students would come over - id do guided sessions with them - and let them off to do it themselves.

    Over time - although I still get a lot of students - the group has grown to include one local priest - one trainee priest - a few people with anger management issues - and quite a few people with addiction issues. Usually alcohol of course.

    And yes indeed Structure and Time Management and Hobbies/Outlets are consistently the best aid I have see - be it vicariously through other people - for coping with addiction and other issues. If you rip an addiction out of your life then something else needs to fill that hole. Too often - for example - alcoholics stop drinking and then sit at home twiddling their thumbs hoping the cravings do not come back. That gap in their life needs _something_ to fill it - and alcohol pours right back into it.

    As cringey as some people find the idea - having a fixed "Date Night" every week for just you and your partner to go out - is a great move - assuming you do not have such a thing already. It doesnt always have to be restaurants or fancy either. Cinema. A long walk. The Pub on occasion even. Theatre. Even a scrabble session in the garden with a glass of wine. It can do a lot.

    Cooking is one that is big for me. I probably spend 2 or 3 times longer per week than the average Joe in making meals in my house. Perhaps off for a guy I dunno :) But through it I learn a lot - become healthier - have a hobby in the home that I have learned to love - and I can pamper my girlfriends in the extreme and make a fuss over them by producing a good meal lovingly prepared for them. Its a hobby - one doesnt have to leave the house for it - and it includes your partner in a visible and tangible way.

    Meditation is a big one for me. So are DIY projects - running - gardening and growing my own fruit, veg, herbs, eggs and where possible meat and a few other studies I engage in - and planning my entry to me and my mates annual weaponised go kart race (it is as bad as it sounds yes).

    I am - I have been reliably informed - a little extreme in the number of things I fill my time with (comes of not owning a television I always say - half jokingly) but perhaps one or more things might inspire you - even if I would not recommend emulating all of it to my insane extremes.

    And remember not all new hobbies have to be solo. Your partner can share in some of them too. But yes - we all need our alone time away from our partner(s) too - so do not go TOO far in either direction.


  • #535
    ectoraige
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,105 ✭✭✭ectoraige


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Do I need to do that though. Surely doing this for her should be motivation enough. Or have i more of a problem ahead than I realise?

    Whether or not you believe you have a problem, her past experience with her father has taught here that words often count for little. Doing this is an act that shows her you're taking it seriously, that it's not just lip-service. You can bring her with you, and get a hug outside when you're done. That's what she'll remember when her own doubts creep in, which they will.
    carraig2 wrote: »
    You know I read stuff on after hours all the time and I always think it's full of lads just taking the p*** but this has been so good for me. lot of people here have been a rock of sense with great ideas and support

    See, my actual advice would have involved a bucket of piss perched over the door, but it may have been against the charter, so I made up a load of namby-pamby crap instead :mad:

    You've also been surprisingly receptive to advice and input from others, the norm would have been for you to become all thick-headed and defensive and have it descend into accusation and counter-accusation until somebody gets a banning.

    TL;DR: Go you! (blast her with...)


  • #536
    Pedro K
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,210 ✭✭✭Pedro K


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Really. What way? Hardly any worse than alcohol industry

    It's ruthless. I worked in bookies in both Ireland and England, over the phone and in shops.

    It can bring out the worst in people. I've dealt with loads of people trying to hide bets from their other halves too. Sometimes they can be terrible to deal with. Whispering over the phone then becoming agitated and abusive because you haven't heard them.

    The same people waiting for me to open the shop door in the morning were the same people I would be pushing out the door at ten in the evening while they're reaching for the gaming machine trying to get 'just one more spin,' on roulette.

    I've seen grown men (and in some cases women) attack gaming machines, cry, become abusive towards me and my colleagues because they're losing and then try justify it as just a bot of harmless fun.

    The bookies say they want you to gamble responsibly. They do in their arse. They want every ****ing penny you have.

    Customers with phone accounts are categorised. The more money you lose, the better your category and the quicker your call is dealt with.

    If you start to win money the bookie will restrict your betting. You'll ask for €500 win at 10/1 and they'll say you can have €5 t the SP. Keep winning, they'll just close your account.

    I saw one man come into my shop, win £500 on a machine, and within 15 minutes he had put that back in plus another £700 from his visa debit card. His daily limit. Every time he came up to put more on he looked like he was going to cry. I really wanted to tell him to stop as he seemed a nice guy, but as the employee you can't do that.

    Another dude once won a €45k return on his phone account. I'm sure he told everyone about it. What he didn't tell everyone, I would bet, is that he gave it back to us (and then some) in a week and a half.

    Not that it's any justification, but at least with alcohol, generally there's only so much you can have before your body just won't let you take any more.

    EDIT: not to mention, from an employee perspective, you get very little protection. For example, somebody hurls vicious abuse at you for nothing more than they've lost a bet. You report it to the superiors, who then investigate it. If the customer is a good customer (losing a lot of money) the company will basically roll over, apologise to the customer for the difficulty they've had and give them a token free bet.

    If the customer is winning money the company will use it as an excuse to close the account and play it off like they care for their staff.


  • #537
    Pedro K
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,210 ✭✭✭Pedro K


    Obviously there are people who enjoy a small bet every now and again. A €5 or €10 accumulator or punt here or there and have control over it. Or people who bet what they can afford to bet and keep it under control. And that's fine.

    But there are plenty of people who have serious problems, and the industry acts like it cares. It doesn't.


  • #538
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    Pedro K wrote: »
    It's ruthless. I worked in bookies in both Ireland and England, over the phone and in shops.

    It can bring out the worst in people. I've dealt with loads of people trying to hide bets from their other halves too. Sometimes they can be terrible to deal with. Whispering over the phone then becoming agitated and abusive because you haven't heard them.

    The same people waiting for me to open the shop door in the morning were the same people I would be pushing out the door at ten in the evening while they're reaching for the gaming machine trying to get 'just one more spin,' on roulette.

    I've seen grown men (and in some cases women) attack gaming machines, cry, become abusive towards me and my colleagues because they're losing and then try justify it as just a bot of harmless fun.

    The bookies say they want you to gamble responsibly. They do in their arse. They want every ****ing penny you have.

    Customers with phone accounts are categorised. The more money you lose, the better your category and the quicker your call is dealt with.

    If you start to win money the bookie will restrict your betting. You'll ask for €500 win at 10/1 and they'll say you can have €5 t the SP. Keep winning, they'll just close your account.

    I saw one man come into my shop, win £500 on a machine, and within 15 minutes he had put that back in plus another £700 from his visa debit card. His daily limit. Every time he came up to put more on he looked like he was going to cry. I really wanted to tell him to stop as he seemed a nice guy, but as the employee you can't do that.

    Another dude once won a €45k return on his phone account. I'm sure he told everyone about it. What he didn't tell everyone, I would bet, is that he gave it back to us (and then some) in a week and a half.

    Not that it's any justification, but at least with alcohol, generally there's only so much you can have before your body just won't let you take any more.

    EDIT: not to mention, from an employee perspective, you get very little protection. For example, somebody hurls vicious abuse at you for nothing more than they've lost a bet. You report it to the superiors, who then investigate it. If the customer is a good customer (losing a lot of money) the company will basically roll over, apologise to the customer for the difficulty they've had and give them a token free bet.

    If the customer is winning money the company will use it as an excuse to close the account and play it off like they care for their staff.

    That is one awful picture you paint, gawd


  • #539
    Pedro K
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,210 ✭✭✭Pedro K


    carraig2 wrote: »
    That is one awful picture you paint, gawd

    That's what it is brother. No matter how much the company tries to advertise it as a bit of harmless fun or 'banter.'


  • #540
    gimmick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 21,296 ✭✭✭✭gimmick


    Pedro K wrote: »
    It's ruthless. I worked in bookies in both Ireland and England, over the phone and in shops.

    Similar story - worked in a pub before with a poker machine. There was a guy would come in a lot, come to the bar, ask for a pint, pay with a €20 and ask for the change in coins. This might happen 5/6 times in the night. he would eventually leave, ashen faced having won either nothing, or a token €10-€15.

    One time, he had asked for change from a €50 in change twice and another number of times with €20s. I said at one stage "are you sure" and he ate the head off me. One of the regulars said fair play and all, but its his money and his business. If he wants to fúck it away, thats his problem.

    I always felt sorry for the guy. Gambling addictions must suck, but a fecking gambling machine addiction? Thats pretty horrific.


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  • #541
    donutheadhomer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,658 ✭✭✭donutheadhomer


    carraig2 wrote: »
    The girlfriend just sent me a message.
    We need to talk.

    Don't like the look of that

    women are always talking - thats why some man invented earplugs


  • #542
    ronjo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,919 ✭✭✭ronjo


    donutheadhomer wrote: »
    women are always talking - thats why some man invented earplugs

    keep up


  • #543
    Dubl07
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,801 ✭✭✭Dubl07


    carraig2 wrote: »
    Really. What way? Hardly any worse than alcohol industry

    A person can only consume so much alcohol before passing out and/or dying. Unless you're drinking somewhere selling very expensive stuff you'll be physically forced to quit at some point having spent X amount of money.

    Gambling can wipe out your entire savings and future prospects in a relatively short time period, even a single night.

    Both are nasty addictions but just because you're not falling around drunk doesn't make gambling 'better' than drinking.


  • #544
    carraig2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,072 ✭✭✭carraig2


    Dubl07 wrote: »
    A person can only consume so much alcohol before passing out and/or dying. Unless you're drinking somewhere selling very expensive stuff you'll be physically forced to quit at some point having spent X amount of money.

    Gambling can wipe out your entire savings and future prospects in a relatively short time period, even a single night.

    Both are nasty addictions but just because you're not falling around drunk doesn't make gambling 'better' than drinking.

    I didn't actually mean it was better to be addicted to gambling than alcohol, I was not talking from the addicts point of view. I was talking about working in the industry. We all see the sh*** bar staff have to put up with in pubs abuse both physical and verbal. I have seen lads off their head on alcohol do things they would die of remorse for the next day. I just never saw that side of the gambling industry. That's what I meant.


  • #545
    snowbabe
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 617 ✭✭✭snowbabe


    Think I've fallen a teeney bit in love with carrig after reading this thread :)


  • #546
    keysersoze0330
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,051 ✭✭✭keysersoze0330


    snowbabe wrote: »
    Think I've fallen a teeney bit in love with carrig after reading this thread :)

    The plot thickens:D


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  • #547
    Renegade Mechanic
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,934 ✭✭✭Renegade Mechanic


    Pedro K wrote: »
    It's ruthless. I worked in bookies in both Ireland and England, over the phone and in shops.

    It can bring out the worst in people. I've dealt with loads of people trying to hide bets from their other halves too. Sometimes they can be terrible to deal with. Whispering over the phone then becoming agitated and abusive because you haven't heard them.

    The same people waiting for me to open the shop door in the morning were the same people I would be pushing out the door at ten in the evening while they're reaching for the gaming machine trying to get 'just one more spin,' on roulette.

    I've seen grown men (and in some cases women) attack gaming machines, cry, become abusive towards me and my colleagues because they're losing and then try justify it as just a bot of harmless fun.

    The bookies say they want you to gamble responsibly. They do in their arse. They want every ****ing penny you have.

    Customers with phone accounts are categorised. The more money you lose, the better your category and the quicker your call is dealt with.

    If you start to win money the bookie will restrict your betting. You'll ask for €500 win at 10/1 and they'll say you can have €5 t the SP. Keep winning, they'll just close your account.

    I saw one man come into my shop, win £500 on a machine, and within 15 minutes he had put that back in plus another £700 from his visa debit card. His daily limit. Every time he came up to put more on he looked like he was going to cry. I really wanted to tell him to stop as he seemed a nice guy, but as the employee you can't do that.

    Another dude once won a €45k return on his phone account. I'm sure he told everyone about it. What he didn't tell everyone, I would bet, is that he gave it back to us (and then some) in a week and a half.

    Not that it's any justification, but at least with alcohol, generally there's only so much you can have before your body just won't let you take any more.

    EDIT: not to mention, from an employee perspective, you get very little protection. For example, somebody hurls vicious abuse at you for nothing more than they've lost a bet. You report it to the superiors, who then investigate it. If the customer is a good customer (losing a lot of money) the company will basically roll over, apologise to the customer for the difficulty they've had and give them a token free bet.

    If the customer is winning money the company will use it as an excuse to close the account and play it off like they care for their staff.


    Carraig2, you need to read and re read this post. Its surprising what a frame of mind or opinion can do. Everyone knows theyre crooks but did you know they were just that bad? How does knowing they categorise you based on how badly they can break you make you feel? Could you hand 100 euros over, knowing the cold, ruthless, calculating bosses that take it that will be fuelling their 6 litre Mercedes jeeps with it while you watch Dail Erin make your life -providing and helping your family- a little harder with every announcement?

    Just focus on that. Focus on the kind of life they have because of what unfortunate people like you and even less fortunate than that are giving them and hopefully, what you feel towards that industry and how it works will be more than enough to keep you from giving them any more.


  • #548
    0ph0rce0
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,049 ✭✭✭0ph0rce0


    Bah! Your ****ed now.

    She has your balls in a vice grips from here on in. You wont be allowed to do nothing no more for fear of her walking out. And she knows that.

    No matter how much i love her, I'd be flinging my missus out the door if she started that controlling ****e.


  • #549
    maguic24
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,790 ✭✭✭maguic24


    0ph0rce0 wrote: »
    Bah! Your ****ed now.

    She has your balls in vice grips from here on in. You wont be allowed to do nothing no more for fear of her walking out. And she knows that.

    No matter how much i love her, I'd be flinging my missus out the door if she started that controlling ****e.

    Jaysus.


  • #550
    Red Kev
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,793 ✭✭✭Red Kev


    0ph0rce0 wrote: »
    Bah! Your ****ed now.

    She has your balls in a vice grips from here on in. You wont be allowed to do nothing no more for fear of her walking out. And she knows that.

    No matter how much i love her, I'd be flinging my missus out the door if she started that controlling ****e.

    I think the OP, (and most of us following this) are grateful that she has given him a second chance.


  • #551
    Renegade Mechanic
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,934 ✭✭✭Renegade Mechanic


    0ph0rce0 wrote: »
    Bah! Your ****ed now.

    She has your balls in a vice grips from here on in. You wont be allowed to do nothing no more for fear of her walking out. And she knows that.

    No matter how much i love her, I'd be flinging my missus out the door if she started that controlling ****e.

    Quite the apt avatar you have, sir.


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