Would you support a family member wanted to die by assisted suicide?

#1 · 17-07-2015 03:21PM #1

I saw another thread on a different forum about euthanisa. In it a man was mentioned who had a very rare type of cancer and he had no hope of surviving and to my knowledge he would had a very poor quality of life. So he decided to end his life via euthanisa. They said they felt so sorry for his family/etc who to the best of my knowledge supported his choice.
I think I would support a family member dying via euthanisa as long as it was a terminal illness/would be in a lot of pain/have a very poor quality of life. I'd also have no problem caring for them during there illness if that's what they wanted.
What would you do?

osarusan · 17-07-2015 03:22PM

Yes I would.

seenitall · 17-07-2015 03:42PM

Yes, I would.

We extend the help to animals that we are too brainwashed and pussy-footed about to extend to human beings.

If someone close to me were in utter pain and misery which will only go one way, and wants it to end, I would see it as my duty to help them end it. Once my child is grown and I don't have any other responsibilities, I would put myself at risk for prosecution for it, too.

It's a very specific situation though, so I hope I never encounter it.

jobbridge4life · 17-07-2015 03:48PM

I don't know. I think I would do everything in my power to try and persuade them not to but if they had made the decision and I knew that they were not for turning on the matter then I would certainly do my best to be there for them.

P_1 · 17-07-2015 03:54PM

Without a shadow of a doubt. Sometimes natural death is a bloody awful thing (both to experience and witness somebody go through). If a family member sought to avoid such a thing and knock their own wicket over it would be frankly inhumane of me to stand in their way.

MagicMarker · 17-07-2015 03:55PM

Of course I would, because I'm not a selfish asshat.

eviltwin · 17-07-2015 03:55PM

Yes I would. And I'd do anything I could to help them.

token101 · 17-07-2015 03:57PM

freshpopcorn wrote: »

I think I would support a family member dying via euthanisa as long as it was a terminal illness/would be in a lot of pain/have a very poor quality of life. I'd also have no problem caring for them during there illness if that's what they wanted.
What would you do?

They are two very different things. Supporting someone's right to choose euthanasia in the event of a terminal illness is one thing, but caring for someone throughout an illness isn't an option for a lot of people for a huge range of reasons.

17-07-2015 04:49PM

When I had to put down my own dog once, the vet put the needle into a vein in his leg, and told me to inject it when I was ready. I'm glad he took that approach, it allowed me to take ownership of the whole thing. Instead of feeling like a pitiful bystander, I felt like I'd lived up to my obligations and had done him a good deed.

Now before anyone recoils in indignation at comparing family members to dogs, I know family relationships are usually more intense, and I'm sure none of us want to be physically wielding the needle. All I'm saying is that perhaps being in that position where you can say, 'we've reached the end, this is cruel, it has to stop', makes you less of a victim.

An inability to intervene or comfort your family member when they are close to death, or even in pain, is deeply upsetting. Anyone who's been in that position knows what a Godsend morphine can be, and everyone knows morphine quickens death. Why can't we just accept and improve upon a practice that is already happening?

RayCon · 17-07-2015 04:53PM

Yes.

Guy:Incognito · 17-07-2015 04:56PM

Yes

Two Sheds · 17-07-2015 04:56PM

Being related to a sick or dying person should not give anybody rights over that person's life. If any of my family took that upon themselves, where my life is concerned, I would politely tell them to go to hell.

NachoBusiness · 17-07-2015 04:59PM

'Yes' if I was in their will and 'No, sure hang on a while' if I wasn't.

rolliepoley · 17-07-2015 05:02PM

I'ed even dig the hole.

JJJJNR · 17-07-2015 05:02PM

Depends, if it was someone like Ian Huntley I would, but then I would resuscitate the bastard, and repeat.

Mam of 4 · 17-07-2015 05:03PM

Yes I would . Would probably break my heart but it would be worse to have it break from watching them suffer excruciating pain if they were truely not going to back down from their decision.

Taltos · 17-07-2015 05:04PM

Absolutely.
If it's what they wanted and had thought it through would have to honour their wishes.

Guy:Incognito · 17-07-2015 05:08PM

Two Sheds wrote: »

Being related to a sick or dying person should not give anybody rights over that person's life. If any of my family took that upon themselves, where my life is concerned, I would politely tell them to go to hell.

You know what "assisted" means yeah? We're talking about someone that wants to die asking for help.

my teapot is orange · 17-07-2015 05:09PM

It depends what you mean by "support". I would definitely be of the view that someone who has no quality of life and wants to end it should be allowed to, but as it stands that isn't always legal. I wouldn't do anything to help that might get me into legally murky waters. Even booking travel would be assisting.

efb · 17-07-2015 05:13PM

If it was their wish yes

freshpopcorn · 17-07-2015 05:15PM

Two Sheds wrote: »

Being related to a sick or dying person should not give anybody rights over that person's life. If any of my family took that upon themselves, where my life is concerned, I would politely tell them to go to hell.

My thread was relating to people who made up there own mind that they wanted to die, not family members choosing to end somebodies else's life.

Captain Chaos · 17-07-2015 05:15PM

Yes, I've seen to many of my family die, wasting away painfully to cancer. If I'm ever that bad I'd beg to be put out of my suffering and not be a burden on my family members of them having to visit me in hospital for months, help me get to the bathroom and do my washing. It's only kicking the can down the road and prolonging needless suffering, that's not life, that's not living.

I'm not saying my dying relatives were a burden during their final months, I just don't want to be that person.

I would help any member of my family suffering that didn't want to be there any more, forcing them to live is just the height of cruelty for selfish reason imo.

I had to put my cat down a few weeks ago, he was only 8 and could have lived another few months in suffering but the right thing to do was put him asleep. I went in with him and the whole process, took him home and buried him. It broke my heart, one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I was very upset, angry and guilty with myself having to do it but it was the right thing.

A family member I would imagine a is million times worse and very hard but when it's the only option instead of them suffering along needlessly and they asked and were still 100% in mind then it's the least you can really do to help them one last time.

henryporter · 17-07-2015 05:16PM

Of course - there's no sane reason to prolong a persons suffering when the only outcome is certain death following cruel and intolerable pain. Needless to say the god heads love that sort of thing which is why they oppose preventing such barbarity

Two Sheds · 17-07-2015 05:42PM

freshpopcorn wrote: »

My thread was relating to people who made up there own mind that they wanted to die, not family members choosing to end somebodies else's life.

Whether they ask or not it still amounts to choosing death for somebody else.
It's an act of extreme arrogance.

Captain Chaos · 17-07-2015 05:44PM

Two Sheds wrote: »

It's an act of extreme arrogance.

It's an act of mercy. Arrogance is standing by and watching them suffer after they have asked for it to be ended.

freshpopcorn · 17-07-2015 05:47PM

Two Sheds wrote: »

Whether they ask or not it still amounts to choosing death for somebody else.
It's an act of extreme arrogance.

I'd consider not allowing somebody carry out there dying wish to be an act of extreme arrogance.

jjC123 · 17-07-2015 05:51PM

Two Sheds wrote: »

Whether they ask or not it still amounts to choosing death for somebody else.
It's an act of extreme arrogance.

It's an act of compassion. Oftentimes there's no dignity in natural death. People who've lived long lives,worked, raised children, been good friends, talented sportspeople/actors/scientists/teachers/ whatever shouldn't be reduced to something ill, incontinent and more dependant than a baby at the end of their lives. If it's their wish, let them go.

Two Sheds · 17-07-2015 05:53PM

freshpopcorn wrote: »

I'd consider not allowing somebody carry out there dying wish to be an act of extreme arrogance.

Surely you mean 'assisting' or even doing it for them? Isn't that what the debate is about?

lazybones32 · 17-07-2015 05:55PM

No, I don't think I'd help anyone kill themselves.

jjC123 · 17-07-2015 05:57PM

lazybones32 wrote: »

No, I don't think I'd help anyone kill themselves.

But the question is whether or not you'd support their decision?

eviltwin · 17-07-2015 05:58PM

freshpopcorn wrote: »

My thread was relating to people who made up there own mind that they wanted to die, not family members choosing to end somebodies else's life.

I think he meant family not respecting a person's wishes and keeping them alive when they want to die

Two Sheds · 17-07-2015 05:58PM

Guy:Incognito wrote: »

You know what "assisted" means yeah? We're talking about someone that wants to die asking for help.

'Assisted' would very quickly become doctors and relatives deciding to do what's 'best' for them.

Two Sheds · 17-07-2015 05:59PM

eviltwin wrote: »

I think he meant family not respecting a person's wishes and keeping them alive when they want to die

Or maybe simply not killing them?

Alexis Sanchez · 17-07-2015 06:01PM

Personally, I have absolutely no problem with abortions, assisted suicide and euthanasia. It's cruel to force some to stay alive if they want to be put out of their misery, be it a physical or mental illness.

lazybones32 wrote: »

No, I don't think I'd help anyone kill themselves.

You don't physically have to help, some trained professional will do it.

Two Sheds · 17-07-2015 06:06PM

Alexis Sanchez wrote: »

Personally, I have absolutely no problem with abortions, assisted suicide and euthanasia. It's cruel to force some to stay alive if they want to be put out of their misery, be it a physical or mental illness.

You don't physically have to help, some trained professional will do it.

Great.. we can hire somebody to do it ... go get a coffee and when we come back it's all over...neat, clean, guilt-free.
The only question is - should we tip?

Fistycuffs · 17-07-2015 06:08PM

It would very much depend on the circumstances for me. I would support someone but I would first try and convince them to reconsider or beg them to take time to decide. The reason I would feel like that is that I have known people with really terrible and life changing illnesses that allow little or no quality of life. I have seen them go through periods of wishing to be dead and considering euthanasia but with time and support come through that and go on to feel differently and live fulfilling lives through difficult circumstances. One of those people lost her sight and ended up very disabled in other manners, she could only go out in a wheelchair if she was brought by someone and even then only for short periods,but she is now very grateful that she didn't follow through on the feelings she had in the first two years of her illness and does talk about that when the subject comes up. Her life is very difficult but she's found things she loves in the middle of it like writing, she lives a small life but not a half life.
There's a huge grieving process involved in acquiring a life changing disability or illness. I would want to be sure that a person I loved was not acting out of that grief if they might feel differently after they'd adjusted, as painful as that adjustment might be.

efb · 17-07-2015 06:12PM

Would you go with someone to Switzerland?

bisounours · 17-07-2015 06:19PM

jjC123 wrote: »

It's an act of compassion. Oftentimes there's no dignity in natural death. People who've lived long lives,worked, raised children, been good friends, talented sportspeople/actors/scientists/teachers/ whatever shouldn't be reduced to something ill, incontinent and more dependant than a baby at the end of their lives. If it's their wish, let them go.

I second (and third) this. When my father was diagnosed with terminal cancer, he was given a year to live. He had 4 months. The speed by which his body degraded (a very healthy, strong man who took great pride in his physical ability) and withered away was heartbreaking. He took it upon himself to sign a DNR (Do not resuscitate) and forced us to sign it as well as acknowledgement. The shame and humiliation on his face every time he lost control of his bowels, the tears he cried when he realised he no longer had muscle control, or wasn't speaking clearly anymore made him lose the will to live quicker than the disease.

SMJSF · 17-07-2015 06:19PM

I agree with it.
It shouldnt be classed as "murder".... but then again, suicide was "a crime" not so far back!
Its totally the persons decision, and others shouldn't try and change their mind if the are terminally ill.
I would like to have the choice to have the plug pulled if i turned into a vegetable state, or went batty to be honest. By then, theres no point in keeping me alive when i cant even function, or have a conversation. I'm nothing or nobody then.

But helping someone to go true with it, it would depend on the situation.

zeffabelli · 17-07-2015 06:21PM

It would really depend on their state of mind and what the illness was, is this an impulsive choice... Are there chances of recovery ....

I've seen a few people now turn dramatic corners from nearly dying and having been seriously ill myself, I can't give a black or white answer to this.

the other question is would you ever ask your children to help you die? That also seems selfish.

Aidric · 17-07-2015 06:29PM

Absolutely. If the person has a terminal diagnosis and no quality of life then it is a dignified and humane response.

Vojera · 17-07-2015 06:42PM

My granda was one of my best friends. Particularly after my dad died and when my mum was going through some really rough stuff, there was always a cup of tea waiting for me in my grandparents' house. When granny went out to bingo granda would tell me stories about being in the reserves during World War II and how himself and granny came to live in our home town and of the different characters in the village and how they came by their family nicknames.

I loved him with all my heart and I miss him all the time, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't relieved when he finally died. He was in so much pain and even worse than that for him was being poked and prodded and having to rely on his wife and children and grandchildren for everything. One night not long before he died he cried and begged his children to let him die. I never saw him cry in my whole life and when mum told me about that night I began to pray every day that he would die and not have to suffer anymore.

I don't pray anymore or have any particular beliefs, but if I was in that situation again and a loved one asked me to accept their decision, or even to help them, my answer would be yes. How could it be anything else?

I've had to make the decision several times to put my pets to sleep as they were suffering and it has always struck me as odd that we consider it a kindness to euthanise an animal but a crime to do so for a person who can ask for it.

freshpopcorn · 17-07-2015 08:04PM

Two Sheds wrote: »

Surely you mean 'assisting' or even doing it for them? Isn't that what the debate is about?

This is the situation I'm referring to. You've a family member who's being diagnosed with a terminal illness. They will loose all there independence. They will also be in a lot of pain. That person could decide to do a few of there wishes and choose when to travel by themselves to a country where assisted suicide is available. Would you support them in there choice or would you try and talk them out of it?
I'm not suggesting somebody gives there granny a load of pills for example.

lazybones32 · 17-07-2015 10:08PM

jjC123 wrote: »

But the question is whether or not you'd support their decision?

And my answer encompassed that. I wouldn't help anyone kill themselves; not by deed, omission, encouragement, approval.

Guy:Incognito · 17-07-2015 10:10PM

lazybones32 wrote: »

And my answer encompassed that. I wouldn't help anyone kill themselves; not by deed, omission, encouragement, approval.

So you'd happily force them to live on much longer than they want, suffering in pain? Charming.I'm sure they'd be very grateful.

lazybones32 · 17-07-2015 10:20PM

Alexis Sanchez wrote: »

You don't physically have to help, some trained professional will do it.

Professional?

'A study published this month in the Journal of Medical Ethics examined the “deliberate” euthanasia of patients in Belgium without their explicit, voluntary consent as required by law. The study’s author, Raphael Cohen-Almagor, a professor of philosophy and ethics at the United Kingdom’s Hull University, found that life-ending drugs were used “with the intention to shorten life and without explicit request”.
http://www.political-correctness.net/belgian-doctors-are-now-euthanizing-patients-without-their-consent/

A different link to an earlier study by the Canadian Medical Journal
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1285423/Half-Belgiums-euthanasia-nurses-admit-killing-consent.html

Wibbs · 17-07-2015 10:21PM

Yep.

Fleawuss · 17-07-2015 10:37PM

Yes I would. And I hope that someone will help me if the need arises. I believe the vast majority of sensible people would. I see no reason why someone I loved should suffer intolerably. There is no reason when you think about it.

princess-lala · 17-07-2015 10:38PM

Two months ago my darling grandad died!

Seven months after he went to hospital complaining of chest pain! He had a quadruple bypass that didn't go according to plan! They couldn't get him off a ventilator!

The hospital he was in kept doing various operations and procedures on the poor man in the hope one would fix him!

Three weeks before he died it was decided with us as a family and with him that the ventilator would be reduced right down and he would drift into a deep sleep and pass away peacefully!!

When asked about this my grandad said "what will be will be, this isn't me anymore" he was fed up of suffering, fed up of hospitals, hated not being able to eat or drink due to a tracheotomy in his neck, he wasn't the man he had been seven months previous!

The day arrived and all of his children and his brother were there. 21 hours later, after lots of laughter, tears and stories he passed away peacefully!! A nurse in the hospital told my mother it was a form of euthanasia!

But if my grandad had asked me beforehand to help him i have absolutely no doubt in my mind that I'd have done it!!

Putin · 17-07-2015 10:41PM

I would absolutely respect anyone's decision to end their life. But I could not play any part in the ending of any life.

QuinDixie · 17-07-2015 11:04PM

Assisted suicide is a very complicated matter that will involve inheritance that may cause preying on the vulnerable by which i mean the depressed, the disabled, the aged.
Remember that when your posting BAA, sorry I mean YES.

Would you support a family member wanted to die by assisted suicide?

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